The secret of sales success is being completely present – always fully in the moment – with your customers. This mental state is called “intentional consciousness” or “dispositional mindfulness.” 

Being fully present implies exercising robust emotional intelligence. When you are fully present with your customers, you manage your attitude and control your behavior. You never inadvertently say or do something that could irritate or anger your clients. You never interrupt or speak over them. To win their approval and cooperation, you remain respectful and courteous.

Salespeople aren’t saints. They’re human beings, full of human imperfections. But when they remain fully present with customers, salespeople set themselves up to manage their temperament and behaviors. Sometimes this requires changing your behavior and habits by using dispositional mindfulness.

Veteran salespeople tend to have a well-developed comfort level with themselves. Normally, this is good. However, such comfort can become a double-edged sword that can lead to “unthinking arrogance” – the kiss of death when interacting with customers.

Salespeople who want productive client relationships must eliminate any negative behaviour they might direct toward a customer, such as impatience or rudeness. This doesn’t require a radical personality transformation. It calls for “shifting into neutral.” 

For your customers to view you as a nice person simply stop being nasty to them. This doesn’t require any new, positive actions on your part. It simply means you must stop doing anything negative. If your customers argue with you, don’t argue back. If your customers criticize your firm, don’t engage with their provocation.

Target your behaviour to fit each customer as you jettison these 16 bad habits:

• Failure to be present.
• Unprofessional language or words that are confusing.
• Selling past the close.
• Selective hearing.
• Contact without purpose or simply for selling.
• Making superficial assessments.
• Using tension as a tool.
• One-upping your own customers.
• Overfamiliarity with the customer.
• Withholding passion and energy.
• Not owning your own product or mistake.
• Never having to say you’re sorry.
• Throwing others under the bus.
• Propagandizing the company line.
• Wasting energy.
• Obsessing over the numbers all the time.

Don’t try to get rid of all your bad habits at once. Deal with your first group of bad habits, and then move on to the others. To determine the most glaring habits you want to address, become a detective about your personality. Note what comments people make about how you act and come across. Write down what you learn. Ask your family members and close friends to weigh in.

Once you have a working list, select your group of three bad habits to focus on and fix. Recruit someone you trust to help you overcome them. Discuss your specific behaviour modification goals.

Engage with a peer coach who will speak with you by phone daily or a few times each week for a few minutes about your self-improvement campaign, without giving you any “negative feedback.” Have your coach record your answers to specific questions on a regular basis, such as, “Did you work on the first set [of bad habits] today?” Offer similar assistance to your colleague. The coach can’t criticize, ask more questions, induce guilt or give feedback. The coach’s purpose is to support your success.

The rules of buying and selling have changed. In addition to being present, you must:

• “Ask” – Ask everyone you deal with for information, feedback, insights and opinions. 
• “Learn” – Salespeople who go out of their way to be proactive learners will gain a valuable competitive advantage.
• “Follow up” – Like everyone else, salespeople must constantly ask others for essential follow-up. Without it, people can’t improve.
• “Grow” – In sales, growth means personal and professional development as a routine activity.

• Not having a personal touch will backfire as customers are loyal to salespeople and not the products.
• Master the basic sales functions first.
• Empathy matters.
• Replace any bad habits with good ones.
• Upgrade your skills constantly.
• Strengthen your talents and stay current.
• Focus on one thing at a time.
• Do not waste time.
• Everything can be harder than it looks.
• Do not give in to distractions.
• Take ownership.
• Perform maintenance.
• Don’t compare yourself with others.
• Measure everything.
• Change yourself, not others.