Deepstash brings you key ideas from the most inspiring articles like this one:
Read more efficiently
Save what inspires you
Save all ideas
In order to stop running away from the feeling of helplessness, we have to train ourselves to be okay with feeling helpless and out of control.When you worry, try to identify the cause or trigger for the worry and notice how it makes you feel emotionally. Be willing to just feel and be with your uncomfortable emotions.
Worry is an attempt to mentally problem-solve something that either isn’t really a problem or isn’t a problem that’s solvable.
And while problem solving is typically helpful in our lives, worry is just a waste of time and energy if we know it can’t actually produce any results.
Just like the body craves calories, the mind craves control. In fact, we can fool our minds into thinking we’re actually solving a problem by running it over and over and over again in our minds. And to make things worse, like junk food, worry also happens to be constantly available, dirt cheap, and instantaneous.
Worry briefly feels good, especially compared to the alternative—doing nothing and just feeling afraid. Worry feels good because it gives us something (rather than nothing) to do. And this makes us feel a little less helpless and out of control.
We may not be able to actually do anything about a problem, but worrying about it makes us feel like we’re doing something.
Worry is our attempt to out-run helplessness. But to stop worrying so much, there’s really only one way out: Acceptance.
Specifically, in order to stop running away from the feeling of helplessness, we have to train ourselves to be okay with feeling helpless and out of control.
... for learning to accept how we feel and break the habit of worry.
Notice little fragments of worry here and there. Notice yourself being pulled by years of habit to start thinking and worrying. Then choose something different. Choose to stay with the emotion, even if it’s just briefly. Then choose to re-direct your thoughts and behavior elsewhere.
SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:
Each time we worry and nothing bad happens, our mind connects worry with preventing harm:
Worry → nothing bad happens.
And the takeaway is, "It's a good thing I worried."&nbs...
Worrying is the mental habit of trying to solve a problem that either can’t be solved or isn’t really a problem.
It gives us the illusion of control. Worrying about i...
When we hide our pain and isolate ourselves, we throw away the most powerful antidepressant: loving support from people who care about us.
You don’t need coping strategies when you’re sad discouraged, or helpless. You need people. You need support. You need someone to give you a hug and listen carefully to your story.
Most of us hesitate to push back and stand up for ourselves because we’re afraid of being perceived as aggressive or rude. And so we default to being passive.
But there’s a middle road between being passive and aggressive: You can be assertive. It means standing up for your own wants, needs, and values, in an honest and respectful way.
Before a stressful work event, we tend to worry about what will happen if we don’t sleep well:
... we make when it comes to sleeping well before a big day:
It's a technique for improving the quality of your sleep by using the power of Sleep Drive (the body’s natural need for sleep). Sleep Drive is built during the day: the longer you’re awake the stronger your need for sleep.
Sleep Restriction temporarily restricts the quantity of your sleep so that you’re awake longer and therefore build up more Sleep Drive.