How to ask for help without making it weird - Deepstash
  • Strong sense of in-group: the belief that the person in need is on your team makes us more helpful to them as we care about what happens to the in-group.
  • Op...

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How to ask for help without making it weird

qz.com

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2 types of gratitude expression
  • Other-praising: involves acknowledging and validating the character or abilities of the giver;
  • Self-benefit: which describes how the receiver is better off f...

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Reminding People That They Owe You One

If you have to remind someone that they owe you one, chances are they don’t feel as if they do. Reminding them that they owe you a favor both makes the other person feel as if you’re trying ...

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Portraying Help As A Tiny Favor

By minimizing our request, we also minimize the helper’s help and thus minimize any warm feelings the act of helping us might have generated.

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Emphasizing The Other Person's "Benefits"

Helping does make people happy, but reminding them of this generally drains the joy out of helping. It reeks of manipulation and control, undermining the helper’s sense of autonomy, and it’s...

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Using Disclaimers

Some feel the need to clarify that they are not asking for help out of laziness or weakness. Although understandable, the people asked to help this way may feel imposed upon as they can’t ge...

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Apologizing Profusely

Being part of a group implies occasional mutual reliance and reciprocity. Excessively apologizing and justifying a request for help implies that you don’t feel part of the group, increasing the ...

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Overdoing It On Empathy

Empathy is elicited when we perceive someone or something in need, when we value their welfare, and most importantly, when we take their perspective.

Eliciting empathy can be a very effective...

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The Selfish Motivation For Helping

It’s a common misconceptions that giving is not supposed to be about you. But choosing to help another is often, if not always, at least in part about how you see yourself and how helping...

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