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How to Overcome Feeling Insecure in a Relationship | Tony Robbins

https://www.tonyrobbins.com/ultimate-relationship-guide/insecure-in-a-relationship/

tonyrobbins.com

How to Overcome Feeling Insecure in a Relationship | Tony Robbins
Your partner is fishing for compliments. They're asking you where you're going, even though they know the answer. They're badgering you for extra attention although you spent the entire day with them. Your spouse repeatedly asks you about your spending time with a coworker who's just a friend.

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What causes insecurity in a relationship

If your partner feels insecure, it’s because they haven’t dealt with whatever is putting them in a negative state

This could be that their needs aren’t being met by your relationship, or it could have to do with something outside your union, like their own lack of self-confidence or fear of the unknown.

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How to overcome romantic insecurity

The best thing you can do is effectively communicate with your partner.

How does your partner communicate? What’s their communication styleIt will take time, effective communication and the desire to improve your relationship to overcome romantic insecurity.

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Meet each other’s needs

There are basic human needs that affect every single person on the planet. 

  • We all strive to feel certain that we can avoid pain and gain pleasure; 
  • we crave variety in life; 
  • we want to feel significant
  • connection to others is essential 
  • growth and contribution help us find fulfillment. 

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Balance your polarity

In every relationship, there is one partner with masculine energy and another with feminine energy. 

If both partners take on masculine or feminine traits, it can cause insecurities to arise. Look at how your roles have changed over time. How can you restore polarity and banish insecurity?

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Act like you’re a new couple

When you start dating someone new, the energy is electrifying. As you become better acquainted with your partner, the fireworks you first felt start to fizzle. 

Bring back the passion in your relationship and act like you did when you started dating. Compliment your partner. Plan surprising dates. These small acts can help to squash insecurities and help your partner feel wanted.

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Create new stories

Instead of insisting that your partner always does something that irritates you, try shifting your mindset.

Accept your partner for who they are and decide to create a beautiful new story together instead of reliving past pain.

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SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:

A toxic relationship

Is any relationship between people who don’t support each other, where there’s conflict and one seeks to undermine the other, where there is competition and there is disrespect.

...

What makes a relationship toxic

People who consistently undermine or cause harm to a partner (whether intentionally or not) often have a reason for their behavior, even if it’s subconscious. 

Maybe they were in a toxic relationship, either romantically or as a child. Maybe they didn’t have the most supportive, loving upbringing. They could have been bullied in school. They could be suffering from an undiagnosed mental health disorder.

Warning signs

The most serious warning signs include any form of violence, abuse or harassment, which should be dealt with immediately. But in many cases, the indicators of a toxic relationship are much more subtle: Persistent unhappiness, negative shifts in your mental health, personality or self-esteem, feeling like you can’t talk with or voice concerns to your significant other.

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The Negativity Bias

The Negativity Bias
... or the Negativity Effect is a tendency most of us have to respond more strongly to negative events and emotions than to positive ones.
Any further action that is ...

Magnified Faults

The Negativity Effect magnifies and distorts your partner's faults, whether real or imaginary.

The partner starts to wonder why isn't there any appreciation for all the good that is being done, and why the focus is only on the one bad thing.

Going Downhill

Relationships, especially long-term ones, don't get better with time but are kept intact by avoiding decline.

Married couples find contentment in other sources and remain satisfied with each other, and if not so, then the marriage breaks down.

Attachment Theory

Attachment theory is an area of psychology that describes the nature of emotional attachment between people, starting with your parents. The quality of how well you were cared for will then influen...

Secure Attachment Style

  • People with this style are comfortable showing interest and affection. 
  • They are comfortable being alone and independent.
  • They can correctly prioritize their relationships.
  • They are able to draw clear boundaries and stick with them.

50% of the population is secure attachment types.

Anxious Attachment Style

  • They are often nervous and stressed about their relationships.
  • They need constant reassurance and affection from their partners.
  • They have trouble being alone or single.
  • They are often in unhealthy or abusive relationships.
  • They have trouble trusting people.
  • Their behavior can be irrational and overly emotional.