How to Set Better Boundaries: 9 Tips for People-Pleasers - Tiny Buddha - Deepstash
Managing Remotely

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Managing Remotely

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Name your feelings

Emotions like overwhelm, anger, and frustration may indicate that others are intruding on your personal time or space.

Instead of pushing the feelings away, try understanding them. It will allow you to set the right boundaries.

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4.91K reads

Prepare your well-being disclaimer

Start conversations about boundaries with a disclaimer to set the stage for a compassionate, permissive discussion.

Share your resolution to set boundaries. Explain why it’s important to you and how you believe it will benefit you.

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When others set boundaries

People who have trouble setting boundaries usually have trouble responding to boundaries set by others.

Instead of feeling dismissed, angry, or rejected when friends or lovers put limits on your interactions, respond with “I value your honesty” or “I appreciate you sharing that with me”—even if the boundary was difficult to hear.

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3.08K reads

Practice saying “no thanks”

It’s common to feel like you need to explain your boundaries to others. But you don’t.

Practice saying “No, thanks” and nothing more.

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Find your trusted people

Without a clear sense of your own boundaries, you may regularly overshare personal information. It can make others feel uneasy and you uncomfortably overexposed.

Create a list of sensitive topics that you will only discuss with trusted people who make you feel safe and seen.

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2.66K reads

Take a break from a toxic friendship

Healthy friendships are mutually nourishing, not one-sided and depleting.

If you have a one-sided friendship that leaves you feeling unseen, unheard, or disrespected, resolve to take a break from that relationship.

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Your post-boundary-setting mantra

It’s totally normal to feel guilty, selfish, or embarrassed after setting a (completely valid) boundary.

Your boundary-setting muscle will take time to develop. Prepare a mantra to refer to after setting difficult boundaries with others. “I set boundaries to..."

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2.64K reads

Designate a 'cheerleader'

Set yourself up for success by choosing a cherished friend, family member, or partner to be your boundary cheerleader.

When you set a new boundary, let your cheerleader know,  and carve out space for the two of you to celebrate your success.

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Imagine how your life will be different

Imagine the many ways you will benefit from setting boundaries.

How will you change? How will your daily life become richer? How might you feel more authentic in your relationships? Keep your vision at the forefront as you make the decisions.

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CURATED BY

emil_ftw

Relationships need work. I study how to be good at it.

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