Constructive conflict can lead to positive growth and transformation, along with the capacity for understanding ourselves and the world around us. It is helpful to recognize the reasons why we wish to avoid conflict.
For example:
<ul>
<li>I want to be liked by everyone.</li>
<li>It's better not to rock the boat.</li>
<li>I might strain the relationship.</li>
<li>I don't know what to say or do.</li>
<li>I would feel too awkward.</li>
</ul>

Transform Conflict Into A Growth Opportunity

Conflict in leadership and life is unavoidable. Instead of seeing conflict as something to be avoided, see it as an opportunity to achieve greater levels of fulfilment.
<ul>
<li>Take the time to really listen before you jump into the conversation. </li>
<li>Pause before you speak. Instead of reacting instinctively, take a deep breath to realign yourself before responding.</li>
<li>Press your internal "reset" button. Pause, take stock, breathe deeply, then determine the "right" next move.</li>
<li>Change the way you view your world. Use your emotions as a gauge to help you understand when your needs are met, and when they are not.</li>
<li>Clearly define your intentions. Being able to articulate your intentions effectually increase your chances of achieving what you want.</li>
<li>Be mindful of body language. Over 90% of our communication with others is nonverbal.</li>
</ul>

Strategies For Successful Courageous Conversation

"Issues that aren’t talked out get acted out in snide remarks and innuendoes, higher absenteeism and turnover, and lower productivity and engagement. When you are discussing something sensitive, what is left unsaid is often what the conversation really needs to be about."

<img width="640" height="239" src="https://www.boldermoves.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/10/convo-803x300.jpg" alt="courageous conversation">Conflict – constructive conflict – can present an outstanding leadership opportunity for positive growth and transformation, along with a deepened capacity for understanding ourselves and the world around us.<h3>Transform Conflict into a Courageous Conversation</h3>Transforming conflict into courageous conversations that achieve results can be thought of as an art form. First, it is helpful to recognize when we may be trying to dodge conflict altogether.The reasons why we may wish to avoid conflict are many. Perhaps some of these statements sound familiar:<UL><LI>I want to be the person everyone likes, to fit in.</LI><LI>It’s better not to rock the apple cart.</LI><LI>I don’t want to get involved. What good would it do?</LI><LI>This is going nowhere. Why bother?</LI><LI>I might strain or erode the relationship.</LI><LI>I don’t know what to say or do.</LI><LI>What if I say something I later regret?</LI><LI>It would just feel too awkward.</LI></UL><img src="https://boldermoves.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/10/exchange-of-ideas-796139_1280-300x300.jpg" alt="Leadership conversations" width="236" height="236" srcset="https://www.boldermoves.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/10/exchange-of-ideas-796139_1280-300x300.jpg 300w, https://www.boldermoves.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/10/exchange-of-ideas-796139_1280-150x150.jpg 150w, https://www.boldermoves.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/10/exchange-of-ideas-796139_1280-768x768.jpg 768w, https://www.boldermoves.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/10/exchange-of-ideas-796139_1280-1024x1024.jpg 1024w, https://www.boldermoves.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/10/exchange-of-ideas-796139_1280.jpg 1280w"><h3>To Authentic Leaders, Conflict = Opportunity</h3>If you tend to see conflict as something to be avoided at all costs, I invite you to think of it in a fresh new way – as an opportunity to achieve greater levels of fulfillment. There’s no doubt: shifting unproductive conflict into a courageous conversation can have powerful results.In truth, conflict in leadership and in life is unavoidable. Let’s focus on what you can do – as an authentic leader and as a human being – to transform that next conflicting situation into a courageous conversation.<h3>5 Strategies for a Successful Courageous Conversation</h3>1- Begin by listening loudly. Before you <a href="https://boldermoves.com/tag/difficult-workplace-conversations/" dir="ltr">jump into the conversation</a>, take time to listen – really listen – to what’s going on around you. What’s being said? Listening loudly doesn’t stop with your ears. Go <a href="https://boldermoves.com/iceberg-model-leadership/" dir="ltr">below the waterline</a> of what you can visually perceive to consider what might be happening just beneath the surface to influence behaviors.2- Before you speak, pause. All leaders feel stressed from time to time. When we feel strained, we may say or do something that feels “out of character” or totally misaligned with our values. <img src="https://boldermoves.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/10/exchange-of-ideas-222788_1280-300x212.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="212" srcset="https://www.boldermoves.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/10/exchange-of-ideas-222788_1280-300x212.jpg 300w, https://www.boldermoves.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/10/exchange-of-ideas-222788_1280-768x543.jpg 768w, https://www.boldermoves.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/10/exchange-of-ideas-222788_1280-1024x724.jpg 1024w, https://www.boldermoves.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/10/exchange-of-ideas-222788_1280.jpg 1280w">Instead of being pulled in by the heat of the moment and <a href="https://www.fastcompany.com/3000139/managing-your-moods-more-effective-leadership" dir="ltr">reacting instinctively</a>, take a deep breath first to realign yourself before responding. And if that doesn’t work, then…3- <a href="https://boldermoves.com/resetting-and-how-it-can-help-you-achieve-better-results/" dir="ltr">Press your internal “reset” button</a>. Resetting allows us to come back to ourselves, to back up and punt when things are getting out of hand or feel overwhelming. Pausing, taking stock, breathing deeply, and then determining the “right” next move create the foundation you need to move forward most effectively. Whether it’s for a couple minutes or much longer, this is one restorative tactic you’ll want to employ again and again.4- Change the way you view your world. What if there were no labels like “good” and “bad”? Imagine how much differently your perception might become if you viewed emotions as a gauge to help you understand when your needs are being met – and when they are not. You may find these resources from The Center for Non-Violent Communication <a href="https://www.cnvc.org/Training/feelings-inventory" dir="ltr">on feelings</a> and <a href="https://www.cnvc.org/Training/needs-inventory" dir="ltr">needs</a> very helpful.5- Clearly define your intentions. Even if this means scribbling down your thoughts on a piece of paper, it’s vitally important that you understand what your intentions are. Why? Because no matter what the situation, being able to articulate your intentions effectually increases your chances of achieving what you want.BONUS Tip: Be mindful of body language. It’s easy to get caught up in the heat of the moment, focusing on what’s being said verbally. Yet, over 90% of our communication with others is actually nonverbal. Therefore, make your nonverbal cues count – here are some <a href="https://boldermoves.com/body-language-strategies/" dir="ltr">body language strategies</a> to know about.<img src="https://boldermoves.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/12/exchange-of-ideas-222786_1280-300x212.jpg" alt="Have courageous conversation" width="266" height="188" srcset="https://www.boldermoves.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/12/exchange-of-ideas-222786_1280-300x212.jpg 300w, https://www.boldermoves.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/12/exchange-of-ideas-222786_1280-768x543.jpg 768w, https://www.boldermoves.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/12/exchange-of-ideas-222786_1280-1024x724.jpg 1024w, https://www.boldermoves.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/12/exchange-of-ideas-222786_1280.jpg 1280w">“Issues that aren’t talked out get acted out in snide remarks and innuendoes, higher absenteeism and turnover, and lower productivity and engagement. When you are discussing something sensitive, what is left unsaid is often what the conversation really needs to be about.”Think about the positive implications of having that courageous conversation. I don’t know about you, but I’d rather bring up what needs to be discussed (even if it is a sensitive topic). When we break the chains of unproductive conflict, we discover the freedom we need to soar to new heights of fulfillment.Would you like to receive a quick burst of inspirational leadership advice, delivered fresh and free to your inbox each week? Sign up for my <a href="https://boldermoves.com/weekly-bold-moves/" dir="ltr">Weekly Bold Moves right here</a>!<img src="https://www.boldermoves.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/Colleen2020-scaled-1.jpeg" alt="" width="100" height="99">

Transforming unproductive conflict into a courageous conversation produces powerful results in leadership and life. Here are some smart tips to guide you.

personaldevelopment

Personal Development

communication

Communication

loveandrelationships

Love & Relationships

leadershipandmanagement

Leadership & Management

Conflict – constructive conflict – can present an outstanding leadership opportunity for positive growth and transformation, along with a deepened capacity for understanding ourselves and the world around us.

Transform Conflict into a Courageous Conversation

Transforming conflict into courageous conversations that achieve results can be thought of as an art form. First, it is helpful to recognize when we may be trying to dodge conflict altogether.

The reasons why we may wish to avoid conflict are many. Perhaps some of these statements sound familiar:

<ul><li>I want to be the person everyone likes, to fit in. </li><li>It’s better not to rock the apple cart. </li><li>I don’t want to get involved. What good would it do? </li><li>This is going nowhere. Why bother? </li><li>I might strain or erode the relationship. </li><li>I don’t know what to say or do. </li><li>What if I say something I later regret? </li><li>It would just feel too awkward. </li> </ul>

To Authentic Leaders, Conflict = Opportunity

If you tend to see conflict as something to be avoided at all costs, I invite you to think of it in a fresh new way – as an opportunity to achieve greater levels of fulfillment. There’s no doubt: shifting unproductive conflict into a courageous conversation can have powerful results.

In truth, conflict in leadership and in life is unavoidable. Let’s focus on what you can do – as an authentic leader and as a human being – to transform that next conflicting situation into a courageous conversation.

5 Strategies for a Successful Courageous Conversation

1- Begin by listening loudly. Before you <a dir="ltr" href="https://boldermoves.com/tag/difficult-workplace-conversations/">jump into the conversation </a>, take time to listen – really listen – to what’s going on around you. What’s being said? Listening loudly doesn’t stop with your ears. Go <a dir="ltr" href="https://boldermoves.com/iceberg-model-leadership/">below the waterline </a>of what you can visually perceive to consider what might be happening just beneath the surface to influence behaviors.

2- Before you speak, pause . All leaders feel stressed from time to time. When we feel strained, we may say or do something that feels “out of character” or totally misaligned with our values.

Instead of being pulled in by the heat of the moment and <a dir="ltr" href="https://www.fastcompany.com/3000139/managing-your-moods-more-effective-leadership">reacting instinctively </a>, take a deep breath first to realign yourself before responding. And if that doesn’t work, then…

3- <a dir="ltr" href="https://boldermoves.com/resetting-and-how-it-can-help-you-achieve-better-results/">Press your internal “reset” button </a> . Resetting allows us to come back to ourselves, to back up and punt when things are getting out of hand or feel overwhelming. Pausing, taking stock, breathing deeply, and then determining the “right” next move create the foundation you need to move forward most effectively. Whether it’s for a couple minutes or much longer, this is one restorative tactic you’ll want to employ again and again.

4- Change the way you view your world. What if there were no labels like “good” and “bad”? Imagine how much differently your perception might become if you viewed emotions as a gauge to help you understand when your needs are being met – and when they are not. You may find these resources from The Center for Non-Violent Communication <a dir="ltr" href="https://www.cnvc.org/Training/feelings-inventory">on feelings </a>and <a dir="ltr" href="https://www.cnvc.org/Training/needs-inventory">needs </a>very helpful.

5- Clearly define your intentions . Even if this means scribbling down your thoughts on a piece of paper, it’s vitally important that you understand what your intentions are. Why? Because no matter what the situation, being able to articulate your intentions effectually increases your chances of achieving what you want.

BONUS Tip : Be mindful of body language . It’s easy to get caught up in the heat of the moment, focusing on what’s being said verbally. Yet, over 90% of our communication with others is actually nonverbal . Therefore, make your nonverbal cues count – here are some <a dir="ltr" href="https://boldermoves.com/body-language-strategies/">body language strategies </a>to know about.

“Issues that aren’t talked out get acted out in snide remarks and innuendoes, higher absenteeism and turnover, and lower productivity and engagement.

When you are discussing something sensitive, what is left unsaid is often what the conversation really needs to be about.”

Think about the positive implications of having that courageous conversation. I don’t know about you, but I’d rather bring up what needs to be discussed (even if it is a sensitive topic). When we break the chains of unproductive conflict, we discover the freedom we need to soar to new heights of fulfillment.

Would you like to receive a quick burst of inspirational leadership advice, delivered fresh and free to your inbox each week? Sign up for my <a dir="ltr" href="https://boldermoves.com/weekly-bold-moves/">Weekly Bold Moves right here </a>!

Authentic leaders have courageous conversations.

Transform Conflict Into A Growth Opportunity

Strategies For Successful Courageous Conversation

MARGIE WARRELL

CURATED BY

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