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Our diminishing resilience and decreasing psychological threshold of handling pain and struggle is, in turn, making everything look like a crisis.
We are making a catastrophe out of eve...
Psychological resilience is not about fake positivity and takes its power from our negative feelings. It makes our anger, sadness, failure and self-loathing into something useful and produc...
Our focus on the self has made us fearful and overwhelmed, especially in times of crisis. Part of our anxiety is the constant focus on oneself. Even if we do focus on others, it is only to judge th...
We cannot control most of the outside events and circumstances including our past, the weather, natural disasters or freak accidents.
We cannot control what other peopl...
If we expect others to be rude, impolite, backstabbing and untrustworthy, they won't really surprise us. It somehow makes our day easier, if we know it in advance. We understan...
No matter how good we expect life to be, the pain, suffering, and the constant struggle is what gives meaning to life. The sweet isn't sweet without the sour.
Investing in the happiness and wellbeing of others, building relationships and making others' lives a little bit easier has a hidden benefit: Insurance.
By spreading your happiness you ...
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During 2020, some have lost loved ones, some are working on the front lines, while other's don't have enough food or a safe place to live.
If you are not one of these people, you ma...
It is comforting to know that other people have wrestled with the same questions we're facing, and have left us their best wisdom.
Guilt is often counterproductive. It makes us feel paralyzed. However, when we are in this state, we are not helping anyone.
One Buddhist teaching could be helpful as one wrestles with this problem. It's found in a discourse called the Sallatha Sutta, known as "The Arrow." When someone has a painful experience, like a physical illness or witnessing suffering, it's as if the world has shot an arrow into the person. The pain is normal. When one tries to make up a story around the pain, you shoot a second arrow into yourself.
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... and boils down to what we give up to attain something. Our mindsets are inclined towards pleasure and resistive towards pain. We normally like to think in terms of gai...
Decisions are a cost-benefit analysis of risking something small for the opportunity to gain something big.
Trade-offs are not something as simple as flipping a coin. Our values guide us towards what we want in life, and it is not the same for all. Example: Buying a house has a trade-off of mortgage for the next ten or more years. This is subjective and depends on what we value in life.
Indecisive people suffer because they don’t know their inner values and what they care about.
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The way we talk to ourselves about the events in our lives is subject to the same laws of learning and habit formation that physical behaviors are.
That means we can learn to talk to o...
Our emotions are always mediated by some form of thinking.
If our thoughts determine how we feel, that means how we habitually think will determine how we habitually feel.
It happens when we assume we understand what other people are thinking without any real evidence.
It is a failure of imagination because we often only imagine and focus on the negative aspects.
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