Problem: You’re taking some time off and don’t want to start your first day back responding to a huge pile of emails. This is perfectly reasonable because time off is time off, not just stockpiling the work you would have done so you can do it when you get back.

Dumb Move: “I’m away from the office and have limited access to email but I’ll get back to you as soon as I can!” This is the email equivalent of hitting yourself in the head with a ball-peen hammer.

Smart Move: Refuse to accept emails when taking your time off.

Problem: You’ve been ghosted.

Dumb move: “Why aren’t you been answering my emails?” You’re basically accusing the other person of being a jerk and immediately putting them on the defensive. If they’ve been avoiding emailing you, this kind of hectoring will only make them less likely to get back to you.

Smart move: Appeal to their better nature and give them a graceful way to re-engage.

Problem: You’ve received an email that is truly idiotic.

Dumb Move: Ignoring it.

Smart Move: Actually, ignoring it is probably the smart move, but if you’re feeling frisky, you could forward the original email back to the sender with the succinct message below:

SUBJECT: Possible Identity Theft

"I’m forwarding you an email that I received earlier today. I feel you should be aware that some *jackass* is sending stupid emails from your account."