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6 Signs of a Codependent Relationship

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https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/anxiety-zen/201609/6-signs-codependent-relationship

psychologytoday.com

6 Signs of a Codependent Relationship
Many people find themselves repeating the same unhealthy relationship patterns-despite their best intentions. Consider codependency-when two people with dysfunctional personality traits become worse together. Enmeshment happens when clear boundaries about where you start and where your partner ends are not clearly defined. Think of the most unhappy couple you've ever met.

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Codependency

The traditional definition of codependency focuses on control, nurturing, and maintenance of relationships with individuals who are chemically dependent or engaging in undesirable behaviors, such a...

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Signs of Codependency

Ask yourself these questions:

  • Does your sense of purpose involve making extreme sacrifices to satisfy your partner's needs?
  • Is it difficult to say no when your p...

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The Development of Codependency

When a child grows up in a dysfunctional home with unavailable parents, the child takes on the role of caretaker, learn to put the parents need first, and repress and disregard their own needs...

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Recovering from Codependency

Getting in touch with deep-rooted feelings of hurt, loss, and anger will allow you to reconstruct appropriate relationship dynamics. You will know you are on track when:

  • You nurture your...

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SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:

Codependent Couples

  • There may be an imbalance of power or one partner may have taken on responsibility for the other.
  • They’re often anxious and resentful and feel guilty and responsible for their partner...

Interdependent Couples

  • Interdependency requires two people capable of autonomy.
  • They share power equally and take responsibility for their own feelings, actions, and contributions to the relationship. 
  • They can manage their thoughts and feelings on their own and don’t have to control someone else to feel okay. 
  • They can allow for each other’s differences and honor each another’s separateness. 
  • There’s support for each other’s personal goals, but both are committed to the relationship.

Codependency

Codependency essentially happens when one person is sacrificing more for their relationship than the other.

In a healthy relationship it's normal to depend on your partner for comfort and su...

Filling in the gaps

The first sign of codependency will involve one person starting to take on the responsibility to keep in touch and connect while the other partner pulls back in how much time, effort, and care they are giving.

As soon as this happens, the relationship has shifted in an unhealthy direction towards codependency.

'Fixing' your partner

Codependent personalities tend to thrive on helping others (or even thinking they may 'fix' them). When caring for another person stops you from having your own needs met or if your self-worth is dependent on being needed, you may be heading down the codependent path.

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A “power imbalance” in a relationship

Power in relationships is the ability of each person in the relationship to influence each other and direct the relationship.

Being in control makes people feel good and may place the ...

Negative relationship dynamics

  • The demand-withdrawal dynamic. One partner seeks change, discussion and a resolution to issues within the relationship, while the other partner is withdrawn, and tries to avoid the issues.
  • The distancer-pursuer dynamic. One person tries to achieve a certain degree of intimacy with their partner, while the other considers this affection to be "smothering."
  • The fear-shame dynamic. The fear and insecurity of one partner would bring out the shame and avoidance in the other. 

Positive power struggle

Not all power struggles are destructive. Some types of power struggles allow growth within the relationship and encourage a deeper understanding and respect for each other.

While it is still a struggle, by the end of it, you have reached an understanding about which lines can be crossed, which not, and how much each partner is able to compromise.

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