It must be related to genuine observations, that reflect back their effort, not ability. Praise the process, not the person.

Highlight aspects of someone’s performance that were under their control  - their planning, their creative ideas, their dedication  - over qualities they were born with. 

By withholding the truth to protect someone’s feelings , even with the best intentions, you’re robbing them the opportunity to learn, grow and improve. And without this, they lose personal responsibility for their actions.

So show them you consider them an equal by being candid. Honesty and transparency are huge indicators of respect.

• Specific: factul and action-based.
• Both positive and negative (six-to-one ratio).
• Actionable: focused on how can something be improved.
• Focused on a shared goal.
• Manageable and simple.
• Neutral: Emotion adds a charge that will cloud the message.
• Dialogue-driven: Making space for the other person to talk will help them open up.
• Linked to consequences.