Once he found said woof, it quickly became apparent that nothing was allowed in “Muggsy’s yard” or within eyesight for that matter. He is a fearless bundle of high energy in short bursts. His little brain seems to convince him he’s the biggest dog on the block. And I’ve never told him otherwise.

<figure><img alt="" src="https://miro.medium.com/max/500/0*NMx8dG5xQeu" width="500" height="333"><figcaption class="hz ia cz cx cy ib ic ce b ga cg fi" data-selectable-paragraph="" dir="ltr">Photo by <a href="https://www.pexels.com/@magda-ehlers-pexels?utm_content=attributionCopyText&amp;utm_medium=referral&amp;utm_source=pexels" class="ck id" rel="noopener" dir="ltr">Magda Ehlers</a> from <a href="https://www.pexels.com/photo/black-and-tan-australian-terrier-puppy-1586948/?utm_content=attributionCopyText&amp;utm_medium=referral&amp;utm_source=pexels" class="ck id" rel="noopener" dir="ltr">Pexels</a></figcaption></figure>I didn’t want a dog. My daughters, all three of them, had been begging me for years to get one. The issue was our eldest daughter as well as my wife had the misfortune of being allergic to dogs. For years this left me in the clear.Then my girls got older and wiser and realized that certain breeds of dogs are hypoallergenic. I was no longer in the clear. I did however make my wishes known that if we were going to get a dog, I wanted a large breed. So, we got a tiny Yorkshire terrier from a local breeder. Getting outvoted is something I’ve grown accustomed to.I did however get to name him, Muggsy. An homage to <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Muggsy_Bogues" rel="noopener" dir="ltr">the shortest player to ever play in the NBA</a>. When Muggsy was a pup, his squeaky barks were cute. As he’s gotten older, the veracity with which he can muster a “woof” is quite impressive for such a little guy — and slightly annoying.Once he found said woof, it quickly became apparent that nothing was allowed in “Muggsy’s yard” or within eyesight for that matter. He is a fearless bundle of high energy in short bursts. His little brain seems to convince him he’s the biggest dog on the block. And I’ve never told him otherwise.In the early days, I admit I hated taking him for walks. I’m above average in height and weight. To be seen with one of these “designer toy breeds” felt emasculating. To my shame, my attitude got even uglier. “I might as well be walking a gerbil in the yard” — I would whine to anyone who would listen. Nobody listened.<BLOCKQUOTE>Want to read this story later? <a href="https://usejournal.com/?utm_source=medium.com&amp;utm_medium=noteworthy_blog&amp;utm_campaign=tech&amp;utm_content=guest_post_read_later_text" rel="noopener" dir="ltr">Save it in Journal.</a></BLOCKQUOTE>I tried to wait until it was dark, either early in the morning or late at night to walk him. Then get one of the girls to take the day shift. Muggsy was too busy exerting his dominance over dandelions and crickets to notice my identity crisis.In short order, Muggsy became one of the family even if I was much later to the party due only to my pride. In time this tiny pooch has even helped me examine my own misdirected masculinity, and humbled me in the process. Who needs a giant yellow lab to prove their manliness anyway? If only they were hypoallergenic — but I digress.In truth, I needed to do some deconstructing of what I considered manly. And figure out why it mattered to me so much that I not be seen with Muggsy in the first place. Eventually, I came to realize that what I was dealing with was a fear of public shaming. I cared too much about what other men might think watching a big guy walk his little dog. No doubt some sneers would ensue and I dared not let my guard down, even for the family dog.<a href="https://real-leaders.com/this-is-what-real-masculinity-should-look-like/" rel="noopener" dir="ltr">In a 2019 article</a> by Grant Schreiber about what it means to be a better man, Dr. John Izzo says:<BLOCKQUOTE>“Men contribute to the suffering of men, and this leads to substance abuse, poor relationships with their kids, fewer friendships, and a feeling of isolation from female counterparts. It’s not like men and women are radically different. But there are meaningful differences that we should be aware of, and work to change.”</BLOCKQUOTE>The sad reality was I didn’t want to get picked on, especially by one of my buddies. They say boys never really grow up. When it comes to this particular issue that is certainly the case at times. We men do so love to pick on our buddies or just about anyone for that matter.When taken too far though each hurtful jab has the potential to launch us back to a place and time where we may have had no control over a given situation. Nobody enjoys that kind of trip down memory lane. Best to avoid any compromising circumstances and save ourselves the indignity of it all. At least that’s what we subconsciously tell ourselves. To our detriment, I might add.When all of this suddenly set into my thick skull, I was embarrassed. How could I let such a dumb and frankly arrogant fear dictate my perception of things? Muggsy didn’t seem to care what others thought after all. Heck, he was ready to stand toe to toe with the neighbor’s Pitbull most days. I could learn a lot from his tenacity. I was growing downright proud of the little guy!And so what started as one man’s failed attempt to get a more “masculine” dog for the family — ended up teaching me a little bit about what authentic masculinity might look like.Additionally, as a father to three girls, do I want them marrying someone who insists on certain props (like big dogs or big trucks) to make him feel good about himself?I think we all know the answer. And it’s my responsibility to model what that “right guy” should look like — one who is comfortable in his skin. I’m a work in progress but with Muggsy’s help, I’ll get there.Of course, any guy is going to have to get by him first. And he’s as tough a dog as I’ve ever seen. Come to think of it — a Yorkie might make a nice wedding gift!📝 Save this story in <a href="https://usejournal.com/?utm_source=medium.com&amp;utm_medium=noteworthy_blog&amp;utm_campaign=tech&amp;utm_content=guest_post_read_later_text" rel="noopener" dir="ltr">Journal</a>.

I didn’t want a dog. My daughters, all three of them, had been begging me for years to get one. The issue was our eldest daughter as well as my wife had the misfortune of being allergic to dogs. For…

parenting

Parenting

I didn’t want a dog. My daughters, all three of them, had been begging me for years to get one. The issue was our eldest daughter as well as my wife had the misfortune of being allergic to dogs. For years this left me in the clear.

Then my girls got older and wiser and realized that certain breeds of dogs are hypoallergenic. I was no longer in the clear. I did however make my wishes known that if we were going to get a dog, I wanted a large breed. So, we got a tiny Yorkshire terrier from a local breeder. Getting outvoted is something I’ve grown accustomed to.

I did however get to name him, Muggsy. An homage to <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Muggsy_Bogues">the shortest player to ever play in the NBA </a>. When Muggsy was a pup, his squeaky barks were cute. As he’s gotten older, the veracity with which he can muster a “woof” is quite impressive for such a little guy — and slightly annoying.

In the early days, I admit I hated taking him for walks. I’m above average in height and weight. To be seen with one of these “designer toy breeds” felt emasculating. To my shame, my attitude got even uglier. “I might as well be walking a gerbil in the yard” — I would whine to anyone who would listen. Nobody listened.

Want to read this story later? <a href="https://usejournal.com/?utm_source=medium.com&utm_medium=noteworthy_blog&utm_campaign=tech&utm_content=guest_post_read_later_text">Save it in Journal. </a>

I tried to wait until it was dark, either early in the morning or late at night to walk him. Then get one of the girls to take the day shift. Muggsy was too busy exerting his dominance over dandelions and crickets to notice my identity crisis.

In short order, Muggsy became one of the family even if I was much later to the party due only to my pride. In time this tiny pooch has even helped me examine my own misdirected masculinity, and humbled me in the process. Who needs a giant yellow lab to prove their manliness anyway? If only they were hypoallergenic — but I digress.

In truth, I needed to do some deconstructing of what I considered manly. And figure out why it mattered to me so much that I not be seen with Muggsy in the first place. Eventually, I came to realize that what I was dealing with was a fear of public shaming. I cared too much about what other men might think watching a big guy walk his little dog. No doubt some sneers would ensue and I dared not let my guard down, even for the family dog.

<a href="https://real-leaders.com/this-is-what-real-masculinity-should-look-like/">In a 2019 article </a>by Grant Schreiber about what it means to be a better man, Dr. John Izzo says:

“Men contribute to the suffering of men, and this leads to substance abuse, poor relationships with their kids, fewer friendships, and a feeling of isolation from female counterparts. It’s not like men and women are radically different. But there are meaningful differences that we should be aware of, and work to change.”

The sad reality was I didn’t want to get picked on, especially by one of my buddies. They say boys never really grow up. When it comes to this particular issue that is certainly the case at times. We men do so love to pick on our buddies or just about anyone for that matter.

When taken too far though each hurtful jab has the potential to launch us back to a place and time where we may have had no control over a given situation. Nobody enjoys that kind of trip down memory lane. Best to avoid any compromising circumstances and save ourselves the indignity of it all. At least that’s what we subconsciously tell ourselves. To our detriment, I might add.

When all of this suddenly set into my thick skull, I was embarrassed. How could I let such a dumb and frankly arrogant fear dictate my perception of things? Muggsy didn’t seem to care what others thought after all. Heck, he was ready to stand toe to toe with the neighbor’s Pitbull most days. I could learn a lot from his tenacity. I was growing downright proud of the little guy!

A nd so what started as one man’s failed attempt to get a more “masculine” dog for the family — ended up teaching me a little bit about what authentic masculinity might look like.

Additionally, as a father to three girls, do I want them marrying someone who insists on certain props (like big dogs or big trucks) to make him feel good about himself?

I think we all know the answer. And it’s my responsibility to model what that “right guy” should look like — one who is comfortable in his skin. I’m a work in progress but with Muggsy’s help, I’ll get there.

Of course, any guy is going to have to get by him first. And he’s as tough a dog as I’ve ever seen. Come to think of it — a Yorkie might make a nice wedding gift!

📝 Save this story in <a href="https://usejournal.com/?utm_source=medium.com&utm_medium=noteworthy_blog&utm_campaign=tech&utm_content=guest_post_read_later_text">Journal </a>.

Real men like small dogss

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CURATOR'S NOTE

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