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8 Ways to Be Kinder to Yourself in 2020

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https://www.nytimes.com/2019/12/24/smarter-living/8-ways-to-be-kinder-to-yourself-in-2020.html

nytimes.com

8 Ways to Be Kinder to Yourself in 2020
You deserve it! Welcome to the Smarter Living newsletter! Every Monday, S.L. editor Tim Herrera emails readers with tips and advice for living a better, more fulfilling life. Sign up here to get it in your inbox. Happy 2020! Are you exhausted yet?

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Time for yourself

According to experts, choosing to spend time by yourself can help your social relationships. Solitude can also help you regulate your emotions. It can have a calming effect that prepares you to bet...

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Take time to be idle

Being overly busy with long to-do lists has become a way to communicate status. Although being busy is not a real status indicator, the impact is real and it contributes to burnout, anxiety and str...

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Casual friendships

Having weak ties (neighbors, your favorite bartender, or fellow members in a spin class) can have a positive impact on our well-being by helping us feel more connected to other social groups.

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Worry doesn't help

Worrying about when something will go wrong will only steal your current joy. Accept that you can't perfectly prepare for potential challenges.

Researchers found students who predic...

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‘Guilty’ pleasures

Guilty pleasures, like junk food or trashy books, can be good for us, as long as we enjoy them in moderation.

Take a mental break and enjoy doing something that doesn't require intense intell...

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Accept compliments

Getting credit for your work gives your brain good feelings and helps you accomplish more.

The psychological impact of keeping a positive view of your accomplishments can decrease stress and ...

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Repeating experiences

Doing something only once may leave you naive to the missed nuances remaining to enjoy.

Experience has many layers of information to reveal. It's probably a good idea to repeat it.

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From regret to self-improvement

Research shows that ignoring upsetting feelings can reduce your capacity for joy and may manifest as physical pain.

Acknowledge the bad experience. Notice your thoughts and sensations. Relax ...

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Phones And The Human Brain

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Studies indicate that regular phone and computer users that physically get away from devices, theirs or not, have an increase in available cognitive capacity and that doing so is the best way to make sure you won’t have anxiety over whatever you might be missing on it.

Maximization

Also known as Fear of Better Options (F.O.B.O.), is the relentless researching of all possible options for fear that you’ll miss out on the “best” one.

Though maximizers tend to make b...

Mostly Fine Decision (MFD)

Your M.F.D. is the minimum outcome you’re willing to accept for a decision.

It’s the outcome you’d be fine with, even if it’s not the absolute best possibility.

Rituals and the sense of control

Rituals and the sense of control

They are a powerful human mechanism for managing extreme emotions and stress, and we should be leaning on them now.
The utility of the ritual isn’t related to its practicality. Absurd rituals ca...

Rituals play a number of critical roles

  • Rituals in the face of loss can help us feel less grief.
  • Rituals with families can make us feel closer.
  • Rituals with our partners can reinforce our commitment to each other.

They are not “elaborate religious ceremonies”, but more often just private and idiosyncratic activities.

Rituals and repetition

Repeated rituals seem to gain in strength, but even one-time rituals can be effective (for example, burning pictures in the place where you met your ex).

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