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How to Be Grumpy: A Guide to Managing Grumpiness Well

How to Be Grumpy: A Guide to Managing Grumpiness Well

https://nickwignall.com/grumpiness/

nickwignall.com

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Grumpiness

Grumpiness

Grumpiness can be defined as a bad mood that tends to last from several hours to a few days.

What we can not really explain is why we are grumpy: there is usually no reason which we ca...

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What causes grumpiness

Grumpiness can be caused by many factors, among which:

  • An unfulfilled psychological need: one way to avoid this is by clearly expressing your needs and, eventually, ...

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Meta-grumpiness

Meta-grumpiness can be explained as the fact of being grumpy because you are grumpy.

Once you have noticed that you are feeling grumpy, this makes you feel even more grump...

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Manage your grumpiness

Managing your grumpiness can have several positive effects on your life:

  • It can lead to an improvement in your personal relationships.
  • It can result in a better work enviro...

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Deal with your grumpiness

In order to handle your emotions and moods, including grumpiness, pay attention to the following steps:

  • Become aware of the fact that you are feeling grumpy: it mig...

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Emotional Intellectualization

Emotional Intellectualization

As adults, the way we express ourselves is ruining our natural feelings. Words are misused to explain something which we feel from the inside, as a primitive defence mechanism to avoid furt...

Trying To Control Our Emotions

Emotions are not easy to be directly controlled, and in trying to do so, people may make it worse. But the most common advice provided by friends and family is to control one’s emotions or to manage one’s mood.

Accepting your emotions instead of controlling or suppressing them may be painful in the beginning but is a more holistic approach.

Judging Our Emotions

Our judgement of emotions, something extremely common, is the fastest way to end up in a therapist's office. Getting judgemental never works in making you feel better.

It is not a good idea to feel bad about feeling bad while you are feeling bad.

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Accepting sadness

Accepting sadness

As we associate sadness with a negative feeling, we tend to try to run away from it.

However, one way to get rid of such fears like being sad is by actually embracing our negative emot...

Embrace your sadness

You might feel sadness from time to time, which actually makes you want to run away from this mood and focus on something happier.

Nevertheless, running has never been a solution and it will certainly not start being one in this specific case, as embracing your sadness is a surer way to control and get rid of it on a long term.

Scheduled sadness

In order to better understand and control your sadness, check out the below steps that lead to a so-called 'scheduled sadness' that will eventually help you reach your goal:

  • schedule a consistent time to focus only on your sadness
  • start by spending ten minutes on the task
  • express clearly the things that have made you feel this way
  • make sure you do not overthink it.

Cognitive Bias

Cognitive Bias

Cognitive Bias is a predictable pattern of mental errors where we misperceive reality and move away from the most likely way of reaching our goals.

These mental blind spots...

Unconscious Bias

Unconscious bias refers to unconscious forms of discrimination and stereotyping. Unconscious bias often leads to discrimination, be it deliberate or unintentional.

Unconscious bias is different from cognitive biases. Cognitive biases relate to our brains' particular wiring, while unconscious bias refers to perceptions between different groups and are specific to different societies.

How to Reduce Unconscious Bias

  • Recognise that the unconscious bias is a systemic issue. Internal cultures need to be checked and addressed first.
  • There is no shame or guilt in unconscious bias. Unconscious bias stems from our tendency to categorise people into social groups and often doesn't match our conscious values.
  • It takes a series of conversations and interventions to prevent and protect against unconscious bias.