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How to Stop Being Passive and Start Getting What You Want

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https://www.lifehack.org/879761/how-to-stop-being-passive

lifehack.org

How to Stop Being Passive and Start Getting What You Want
If you want to learn how to stop being passive, first you have to explore the roots of passivity and how to overcome the negative side of it.

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Stuck in a state of passivity

Stuck in a state of passivity

Passive behavior is the sense of feeling a lack of motivation, energy, and willpower. It is often the cause of people feeling stuck at work or in their life.

It occurs whe...

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Lack of motivation leads to passive behavior

The most common cause of passive behavior is being unmotivated.

It is a myth that motivation needs to come before action. More often, it is action ...

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Lack of goals lead to passivity

When your only goal is to make it through the week, you may feel like you spend your life going through the motions with the same tasks week in and week out. It can become very dull. Findin...

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Analysis paralysis and passivity

Anything that involves analysis can cause passive behaviour. Analysis paralysis is so common today due to the numerous sources of information available. You can spend hours analysi...

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The good form of “passive”

Passivity is not always bad. Passive can also relate to peace, contentment, creativity, and inspiration. Great individuals throughout time emphasized stillness and reflection.

The good for...

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Being proactive, not reactive

An effective way to stop being passive is not to react to other people and situations as soon as they happen. When we immediately react to an issue, we may often respond angrily or...

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Live in the present, but consider the future

While we can never accurately predict the future, it is useful to consider how it might play out. Keep in mind the goals you want to achieve and the circumstances you want in life....

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Being passive as an emotional issue

The reason for your passivity is probably because you are convinced that you need to be motivated before you can take action.

Being passive and uninspired is often an emotional issue that n...

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SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:

Habits and behavior change

Building habits to change behavior the right way can be a wonderful tool to improve your life. But false notions about what habits are and what they can do can ...

Habits are a type of learning

They generate an impulse to do a behavior with little or no conscious thought.

By forming a habit, the brain frees the mind to do other things without deliberation. So behaviors that require concentration, deliberation, or extended effort, are not habits.

What drives motivation

Motivation is not driven by pleasure and pain, but rather by the desire to escape discomfort.

Our brains get our bodies to do what they want through discomfort. And the same rule applies to psychological discomfort. 

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Cal Newport on better managing time

  • To-Do lists are useless. Schedule everything.
  • Assume you’re going home at 5:30, then plan your day backwards.
  • ...

Diffuse the fear of being rejected

... by acknowledging and expecting it can and will hurt.

To overcome the sting of rejection, stop trying to avoid feeling that stings. Stop pretending your unaffect...

Interrupting rumination

Make a contract with your partner, family, and friends allowing them to catch you in the throes of verbal diarrhea when you were unfairly treated.

Work out three or four different activities that will distract you and turn your attention to something productive. 

Regulate the number of rejection opportunities

 ... you expose yourself to.

We all have a different threshold of the amount of rejection we can handle. Wisely considering how much more you can handle is essential. 

Before you take another step forward, ask yourself if you have the right resources and support in place to catch you.

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Knowledge And Results

New knowledge does not necessarily drive new results, especially if your goal is to make progress and not to simply gain additional knowledge.

The gap between where you are now and where you ...

“When we practice something, we are involved in the deliberate repetition of a process with the intention of reaching a specific goal. The words deliberate and intention are key here because they define the difference between actively practicing something and passively learning it.”

“When we practice something, we are involved in the deliberate repetition of a process with the intention of reaching a specific goal. The words deliberate and intention are key here because they define the difference between actively practicing something and passively learning it.”

Learning vs. Practicing

Passive learning creates knowledge. Active practice creates skills.

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Hating Ourselves

Hating Ourselves

"I hate myself" is a common self-talk. You really are your worst enemy, however painful this may feel.

Feelings of self-hatred and unworthiness are felt by a majority of people. E...

Effects of Self-Hatred

Self-hatred gives us negative thoughts, telling us we are unattractive, lack confidence, and are generally unworthy. If we listen to it, we give it power. We then create a negative shield around us and will have trouble accepting love and compassion.

The internal negative breeding will attract further negativity in our lives and relationships.

How To Stop Hating Yourself

  • Pay attention to your triggers by reflecting on your thoughts and actions, identifying your inner negative talk.
  • Question and challenge your negative thoughts, and detach from them.
  • Start saying positive affirmations to yourself to counter the negativity.
  • Reframe your negative thoughts by changing your point of view.
  • Spend time with positive people who fill you with joy.
  • Seek professional help as this may be a mental health issue.

Productivity Shame

Productivity Shame

Work is never finished, and we are unable to disconnect from it, causing us to experience productivity shame, impacting our happiness and creativity.

The modern working pro...

The Busyness Paradox: Addicted To Being Busy

  • Personal productivity is not about all-round efficiency, and it is wrong to think about your input as that of a machine in a factory unit.
  • This is further complicated by our mistaken assumption that being in demand means that we are doing a splendid job.
  • We blur our all boundaries between our work and personal life and every minute of the day is to be kept busy as we rush to attend every meeting, cross out every task from the to-do list or to answer every email that we get.

Completion Bias

Our brain starts to favour small tasks that give a false impression of productivity (woohoo! I just sent out fifty emails!) while we neglect the large, complex but meaningful tasks.

This is known as the completion bias.

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We are creative in the morning and analytical at night

Your brain is more creative in the morning and more analytical at night.

Use your analytical evening strength to provide a simple plan and starting-point so your cr...

Tim Ferriss

Tim Ferriss

“A person’s success in life can usually be measured by the number of uncomfortable conversations he or she is willing to have.” 

Become very good at living each day

Momentum is created or destroyed every day with the first few decisions you make.

If you learn to master your day, you’ll learn how to master your weeks, months, years, and life.

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Getting Negative Feedback

Getting Negative Feedback

... is not the best thing to happen at work. It normally leads to a racing mind, emotional discomfort and increased blood pressure.

We may try to defend ourselves, or brush aside the feedba...

It’s Not Personal

Unless it is completely uncalled for, negative feedback generally has the intention of informing us about our areas of improvement. If feedback isn’t provided, you may not grow and improve. If no one tells you that you are doing something wrong, you will keep doing it wrongly forever.

Providing timely feedback may be a sign that the manager cares and wants you to improve.

Don’t Shoot The Messenger

One should not be defensive when provided with negative feedback, and understand that it is for our own good.

One needs to act on the feedback by approaching it from a neutral and objective standpoint, not taking it as a personal attack. Instead of reacting, just pause and listen. Reflect on the feedback, giving yourself some time and space to respond with a level head.

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Using Office politics to your advantage

Office politics are a reality, and avoiding them altogether risks not having a say in what happens. 

It also allows people with less experience, skill or knowledge than you to inf...

Analyze the Organization Chart

Map the political power and influence in your organization, rather than people's rank or job title.

Ask yourself questions like, "Who are the real influencers?," "Who has authority but tends not to exercise it?," "Who is respected?," "Who champions or mentors others?," and "Who is the brains behind the business?"

Understand the Informal Network

Examine people's interactions and relationships to understand the informal or social networks.

Watch closely (but discreetly and respectfully) to find out who gets along with who, and who finds it more difficult to interact with others. 

Notice whether connections are based on friendship, respect, romance, or something else.

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