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That Discomfort You're Feeling Is Grief

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https://hbr.org/2020/03/that-discomfort-youre-feeling-is-grief

hbr.org

That Discomfort You're Feeling Is Grief
Executive Summary During the global pandemic, a palpable sense of collective grief has emerged. Grief expert David Kessler says that grief is actually multiple feelings that we must manage. In an interview with HBR, he explains how the classic five stages of grief (denial, anger, bargaining, sadness, acceptance) apply today, and the practical steps we can take to manage the anxiety.

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We're feeling different griefs

We feel the world is different, and although temporary, we know it will not be the same again.

We feel the fear of economic turmoil and the loss of connection. And we're grieving c...

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Anticipatory grief

Anticipatory grief is feeling unsure of what the future holds. It is that same feeling when someone gets a grave diagnosis. 

We know there is a storm brewing, and it breaks our se...

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Managing all this grief

Understand the stages of grief and realize that the stages are not linear.

Denial: The virus won't affect us.
Anger: You're taking away my f...

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Techniques to deal with grief

In unhealthy anticipatory grief, we are experiencing anxiety. Our minds look for the worst scenarios. That's our minds being protective.

The goal is not to ignore the worst scenario, but ...

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Let go of what you can’t control

What your neighbor is doing is not in your control. What is in your control is staying far enough away from them and washing your hands.

But, you should also have compassion. ...

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The last stage of grief

The last stage of grief is meaning. After acceptance, we want something meaningful to come out of those darkest hours.

We start to realize that we c...

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Feeling overwhelmed with grief

There is something powerful when we name the feeling of grief. It helps us feel what's inside. You don't have to tell yourself that you feel sad but shouldn't feel sad. Just feel sad for a few m...

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Tough emotions are essential for living

How we deal with our emotions affects how we love, how we live, how we parent and how we lead.

We should not view our emotions as good or bad, positive or negative. We need our emotions for real resilience.

Moving Beyond Emotional Rigidity

When we go through tough situations, we cannot ignore our negative emotions with the hope that they don't matter.

Write down what you are truly feeling in a personal notebook. Move beyond the rigidity of denial.

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Good Grief

The five stages of grief are: 

  • denial (inability to accept reality), 
  • anger (physical tension, frustration, resentment), 
  • bargaining (magical thinking, pleading to God), 
  • depression (sadness, emptiness, guilt, sleeplessness, loss of appetite, hopelessness),
  • acceptance. 

Become Anti-Social (Media)

Nothing good can come from looking at your ex’s Instagram stories or Facebook timeline. When it comes to social media, just say no.

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