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The Dark Side of Emotional Intelligence

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https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2014/01/the-dark-side-of-emotional-intelligence/282720/

theatlantic.com

The Dark Side of Emotional Intelligence
Since the 1995 publication of Daniel Goleman's bestseller, emotional intelligence has been touted by leaders, policymakers, and educators as the solution to a wide range of social problems. If we can teach our children to manage emotions, the argument goes, we'll have less bullying and more cooperation.

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Using Emotion to Influence

Whether it is the public speeches of Martin Luther King Jr. or even Adolf Hitler, emotional intelligence is at play to persuade and influence the mass audience.

The world's most influential l...

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Emotion Overshadows Content

When an emotionally charged speech is given, the people hearing it surprisingly do not give much attention to the content. They only seem to recall the raw emotional power and do not scrutinize the...

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The Dark Side of EI

People having psychopathic tendencies and self-serving purposes can use Emotional Intelligence (EI) as a weapon to manipulate others.

Example: Some office team members demean and embarrass...

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Manipulation by Selective Emotions

A way to manipulate emotionally, used by the emotionally intelligent people, is to only show the emotions selectively, for personal gain.

Emotions are shaped according to what will influence ...

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Leaderships skills related to EQ

  • Working to inspire and motivate those around;
  • Focus on collaboration between team members, which creates synergy and a better experience for employees;
  • “Walking the talk,” or a...

Emotional Intelligence( EQ/EI)

Is the measure of an individual’s abilities to recognise and manage their emotions, and the emotions of other people, both individually and in groups.

Benefits of a higher EQ

  • Ease in forming and maintaining interpersonal relationships and in ‘fitting in’ to group situations.
  • A better understanding one's own psychological state, which can include managing stress effectively and being less likely to suffer from depression.

IQ and EQ

There is no correlation between IQ and EQ scores.

IQ has no connection with how people understand and deal with their emotions and the emotions of others (EQ). 

You simply can’t predict emotional intelligence based on how smart someone is.

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Emotional Intelligence Matters

EQ is not only the ability to identify and manage your own emotions, but it’s also the ability to recognize the emotions of others.

Manage your negative emotions

When you’re able to manage and reduce your negative emotions, you’re less likely to get overwhelmed. 

If someone is upsetting you, don’t jump to conclusions. Instead, allow yourself to look at the situation in a variety of ways. Try to look at things objectively so you don’t get riled up as easily. 

Be mindful of your vocabulary

Emotionally intelligent people tend to use more specific words that can help communicate deficiencies, and then they immediately work to address them. 

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