Watch carefully. - Deepstash
Watch carefully.

Watch carefully.

Most of us are hardest on ourselves, so make a habit of observing others (without making a big deal out of it). You may find that other people are suffering from their own symptoms of insecurity and that you are not alone.

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MORE IDEAS FROM THEARTICLE

Know your strengths.

Make a list of all your positive qualities--enlist a friend or family member to help if you need to--and read or recite it when you're feeling insecure. Let it remind you how much you have to offer.

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Stop self-sabotaging.

Sometimes we really are our own worst enemy. Don't allow your inner critic to put you down. Instead, analyze the power of that voice so you can defuse it.

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Avoid the label.

Don't label yourself as shy--or as anything. Let yourself be defined as a unique individual, not a single trait.

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Don't tell.

There's no need to advertise your shyness. Those who are close to you already know, and others may never even have an opportunity to notice. It's not as visible as you probably think.

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Remember that one bad moment doesn't mean a bad day.

Especially when you spend a lot of time inside your own head, as shy people tend to do, it's easy to distort experiences, to think that your shyness ruined an entire event--when chances are it wasn't a big deal to anyone but you.

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Choose relationships carefully.

Shy people tend to have fewer but deeper friendships--which means your choice of friend or partner is even more important. Give your time to the people in your life who are responsive, warm, and encouraging.

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Change your tone.

If you blush when you're uncomfortable, don't equate it with shyness. Let it stand on its own: "I've always been quick to blush."

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Sometimes when you're scared, the best thing to do is to face it head on. If you're frightened, just stare it down and lean into it.

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There are always a few people who are willing to be cruel or sarcastic if it makes for a good punch line, some who just have no sense of what's appropriate, and some who don't care whom they hurt. Keep a healthy distance from these people.

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Shy people sometimes feel disapproval or rejection even when it isn't there. People probably like you much more than you give yourself credit for.

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Name it.

Make a list of all your jitters and worries. Name them, plan how you're going to eliminate them, and move forward.

Suffering from shyness shouldn't keep you from the success you are seeking, so try these simple tools and make them work for you--in fact, they're good techniques to try whether you're shy or not.

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Keep it light.

If others bring up your shyness, keep your tone casual. If it becomes part of a discussion, speak of it lightheartedly.

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Confidence comes from within

Much of the confidence we crave is based on how we want others to see us.

Confidence comes from within. It’s not just about owning the stage and giving a knockout performance but putting the time in to learn the lines, finessing the routine.

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Confidence and self-perception
Confidence is not necessarily linked to any external marker - our confidence is rooted in our perception of ourselves regardless of any tangible external reality. So improving the external, tangible aspects of our lives won't necessarily build confidence.  - Mark Manson

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1. Become aware of your actions

The first step to stop seeking approval of others is to become aware that we are stuck on doubt, insecurity, or uncertainty. We must recognize that our actions (of seeking approval) comes from the emotions and beliefs that arise within us.

Once you become aware of how often you're seeking approval from others, you can begin to work on yourself from within.

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