For the good of the relationship, every... - Deepstash
How To Make Friends As An Adult

Learn more about loveandrelationships with this collection

How to find common interests

How to be a good listener

How to overcome social anxiety

How To Make Friends As An Adult

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  • For the good of the relationship, every argument needs to start the same way: Partners need to give each other the benefit of the doubt. Rather than start off assuming your partner is wrong, is hopelessly flawed, has bad intentions, or is trying to hurt you, you give them what psychologist Carl Rogers calls “unconditional positive regard,” or the belief that at their core, everyone is a good person.
  • For successful conflict resolution, next, you need to know what type of problem you’re dealing with. Serious problems should be dealt with differently than the more mundane problems. 

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Listening Techniques-2

4. Paraphrase: To demonstrate your understanding, you should be able to recap what your partner is saying, using your own words. This has two big benefits: First, it shows your partner that you’re deeply invested in the conversation; second, knowing you need to paraphrase forces...

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Short-term gain, long-term pain.

Short-term gain, long-term pain.

  • Researchers from the University of Michigan and Penn State University followed more than 1,500 adults for more than a week, they found that while people felt better on the day they avoided an argument, the next day they had diminished psychological well-being and increased cortisol, which ca...

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Conflict Triggers

According to a 2019 study, here are the top three conflict triggers that upset, irritate, hurt, or anger partners

1. Condescension (i.e., you are treated...

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Listening Techniques-1

Regardless of the problem, there’s no substitute for listening to your partner.

How do we become better listeners? Give a “CRAPO”. Here’s what I mean:

1. Clarify: Be clear about what they’re saying if not ask questions. 

2. Reflect th...

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Communicate

Communicate

Your partner is not a mind reader. Share your thoughts. Give them the information they need rather than expecting them to know the unknowable.  

The more that remains unspoken, the greater the risk for problems.  Most problems, big and small, within a relationship, start with bad communicat...

Lesson 2: Don't Take Anything Personal

Lesson 2: Don't Take Anything Personal

  • When someone calls you ugly, it says a whole lot more about them and their problems than about you.
  • Whatever issues they’re dealing with has led them to take their frustration out on you.
  • The only way to really make this a habit is to become very, v...

Empathy

Empathy

Empathy is the ability to feel and relate to another being. It's natural to experience this towards our friends, family, colleagues, and even strangers. When we empathize with someone, our good intentions often get lost in translation when we communicate.

Oftentimes,...

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