Below, she offers insight into building better boundaries and maintaining them. 1. Name your limits. You can't set good boundaries if you're unsure of where you stand. So identify your physical, emotional, mental and spiritual limits, Gionta said. Consider what you can tolerate and accept and what makes you feel uncomfortable or stressed.
Our personal boundaries aren't as obvious as a fence or a giant "no trespassing" sign, unfortunately. They're more like invisible bubbles. Even though personal boundaries can be challenging to navigate, setting and communicating them is essential for our health, well-being, and even our safety.
Boundaries improve our relationships and self-esteem. They protect relationships from becoming unsafe.
Boundaries can be flexible. It’s good to think about them occasionally and reassess them.
Boundaries allow us to conserve our emotional energy. Without them, self-esteem and identity can be affected, and you can build resentment toward others.
Boundaries give us space to grow and be vulnerable.
"Boundaries are a part of self-care. They are healthy, normal, and necessary." ~Doreen Virtue I still have the journal entry that sparked my journey into boundary setting. It says, in striking black pen, "I wish I could speak my truth. If I can learn to speak my truth before I die, I will die a happy woman."
People who have trouble setting boundaries usually have trouble responding to boundaries set by others.
Instead of feeling dismissed, angry, or rejected when friends or lovers put limits on your interactions, respond with “I value your honesty” or “I appreciate you sharing that with me”—even if the boundary was difficult to hear.