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Introverts And Social Situations

35 STASHED IDEAS

You pop up now and again to your connections and acquaintances (old and new), without any obligation to follow up or see each other in person.

  • It helps you to connect even with your weak or dormant ties, that will, in turn, be able to help you if you with what opportunities they have. 
  • You can connect via text or email, and you can take the time to compose thoughtful messages without being put on-the-spot.
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@kin81

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Communication

Just spending 10 minutes a day on loose touch can keep you connected with a lot of people you made contact with online or professional or elsewhere.

"I’ll share a story or two that I know are of interest to people I know, along with a short note: “This made me think of you. What’s your take? And how are you?"

Practice networking everyday
The key to overcoming your fears about networking is to practice a little bit every day — and to do it when you don’t need specific help.

If you do this when you’re not feeling needy, you will begin to see yourself as a giver, not a taker. It will help you get over your fear of feeling needy.

... is to put you into someone’s consciousness for a few minutes, and vice versa.

In cultivating loose-touch connections, know that your network won’t appear all at once; it takes steady, continuous work.

You do it intermittently, not constantly, and there’s an unforced quality that works for everyone. 

You stay in touch over time because you should always be looking out for your friends and former colleagues and neighbors. If you’re a good person, you are always ready to help them — and then it’s easy to receive or ask for help later.

  • Know your boundaries. Introverts are often not comfortable with uncertainty about when something will end. 
  • Control the setting. If going out is not easy, have people come to you.
  • Focus on activities, as a class at a local college or community center. Sometimes just being around people is enough.
  • Join a club based on your personal interests or hobbies.
  • Socialize from afar. Social media is another way for introverts to stay connected.
An introvert

... is someone who enjoys solitude and focuses more on internal thoughts and feelings. 

Unlike extroverts, who gain energy from social interaction, introverts often expend energy in social situations. After being with a large group, people who are introverted often feel a need to recharge by spending time alone.

We really do well when we connect with others, even for brief periods. You don't need to change your nature in order to socialize more.

Instead of fighting your personality, work with it, and focus on the type and level of interactions you can do and enjoy.

  • Learn to recharge by yourself. You can be enormously creative and successful once you know how to recharge.
  • Create a life where you can have more time by yourself.
  • Make small incremental moves towards the life you want to live.
  • Ask yourself throughout the day: is this activity giving me energy or draining me? 
  • Be humble enough to realize what you are not good at. 
  • Self-esteem is great if you earn it. But if you have no gas in the car, faking your gas gauge won’t make the car run longer.
Being an introvert
Being an introvert has nothing to do with being shy.

All it means is that some people recharge when they are by themselves (introverts).

  • Write down ten ideas a day to keep being creative.
  • Read a lot to keep learning.
  • “Execution ideas” are a subset of ideas. When you have an idea you want to test, think of the next execution ideas to get the idea done.
  • Talk with friends who can help if you think the idea is starting to gain traction.

  • Focus your execution efforts on the things you're skilled at and hire or outsource the other things.

  • Work with people who are good at what they do, so you can be good at what you do.

Balance

Quieter people tend to make themselves small, tight. You don't have to make yourself large, just centered.

  • If you’re standing, get in a strong stance: put one foot slightly in front of the other to avoid swaying.
  • If you’re sitting, sit so that you are able to move forward, backward, and side to side without shifting your weight, leaning on your arm, or twisting your body.

You need to resonate your voice in your mouth, not your nasal passages or your throat.

To see what it feels like to have your voice resonate in your mouth, make an “mm” sound so that your lips begin to tingle. Then, say “me” and note what it sounds like. By moving your sound forward in your mouth, you will naturally develop more resonance.

You develop resonance through relaxation, not by force.

You may struggle with eye contact and need to learn how to focus your gaze to build leadership presence.

But controlling your gaze is not about going eyeball to eyeball. You have to try and make eye contact with each person, for at least five second.

Don’t just pace around the room—move with purpose.

  • You can move between points like through the white space between paragraphs. 
  • You can also use movement to create highlights and emphases. 
  • If you stop suddenly, your audience will wonder why. Now you have their attention, and you can add power to your next statement. 
Introverts and authenticity
If you’re an introvert, you don’t need to change your personality to develop leadership presence. You just need to learn a few skills.
Smooth gestures

Keep your gestures fluid if you want to highlight your message and build your leadership presence.

If you are continuously moving your hands in the same way, you are connecting your behaviors to your feelings, consciously or not. You want your gestures to be connected to your message, not your mood.

Introverts are usually much better at written rather than oral communication. If you’re that kind of an introvert, take advantage of it.

As an introvert, you can easily be good in self-advertising, only in a different kind of way; there’s no need for you to greet big crowds of people, all you have to do is open a word processor or an online publishing platform and start writing. 

Ideas for making sure you’re a good team worker as an introvert:

  • Make sure you have a place to work in solitude, but when you do participate in a meeting, play a very active role.
  • Respect all the extroverts and they’ll respect you too. 
Introverted vs. extroverted people

If you recover your energy while alone or in quiet surroundings, you’re probably an introverted type of person.

You can experience the benefits of both types when you push yourself to overcome weaknesses of one type or the other at key moments in your life.

Introverts are supposed to dislike any sudden changes, as this puts puts introverts under a lot of stress.

If you’re prepared and have worked out alternative options, your stress level goes down fast.

No matter how resourceful you are, make sure you also build some security nets with outer resources (30 %).

Working alone

Introverts flourish when working alone and it can be a big advantage if you’re an organized person. Distinguish between important and urgent tasks and make sure that there are no distractions when you’re working. By doing that, you can become incomparably more productive than other people.

  • Especially work on big and complex tasks, where your concentration power blossoms.
  • Look for important details that others can’t see.
  • Create a superior system of gathering, processing and connecting information.
  • Become really good with technology and leverage it for your success.

For introverts, having a few close friends is enough and making new connections frequently doesn’t seem to make sense. That’s a very wrong approach to life.

Tricks that can help you make new connections.

  • You don’t have to break the ice, because there is no ice. All you have to do is say hi. It is not an enormous effort.
  • You don’t need to become good at small talk. Go straight to deep and meaningful questions.
  • Create and do awesome things. Others will want to network with you.

As an introvert, you probably have an incredible capacity to analyze, prioritize ideas and connect ideas to an environment, thinking through what it would take to realize them.

Every day, try to write down at least 20 to 50 ideas to keep your creative muscle strong, because you can forget them more easily­, since you usually brainstorm ideas without interacting with other people who could help you remember.

Thinking before speaking and acting
  • Make sure that you speak up when you have something important to say. 
  • Take advantage of your ability to observe other people, the environment you’re in and the energy flow in the room.
  • People will pay more attention to what you say when you do speak up.
  • You probably have the ability to study things better and faster, so when you do say something make sure that it’s an eye-opener.
  • People will trust you more and thus you’ll have access to more privileged information.

Introverts can build social position and personal brand on prestige. That includes genuinely taking care for others, sharing information and expertise, connecting people, sharing positive values etc. It’s a path every courageous introvert can take in order to leave their mark on this world.

Being a good listener is a very important skill and as an introvert, you can develop an outstanding ability to pay attention to what people are saying.
If you’re an introvert, you’re much more sensible to any stimuli from the environment. Therefore make sure that you turn off your phone and all other possible distractions from the environment when you’re talking to someone.

Self-advertising
  • Prepare yourself really well for those few moments  when you have to push yourself over being an introvert. 
  • You can more or less substitute in-person advertising with written self-promotion.
  • Make sure you get recommendations from people who know what you can really deliver.
  • Be a quiet producer and hire other people to do all the advertising and selling for you.

If you’re an ambitious introvert, you’ll find yourself in situations where being an extrovert is sometimes a must. But only for a short period of time. Afterwards, you can go simply back into introverted mode.

This can sometimes be necessary to show that you have the skills and can be assertive and achieve goals in life.

As an introvert, you have a great capacity for building deep and strong relationships with family, friends and your spouse. Make sure that you do that and it’ll also give you the courage to act more extroverted in other areas of life.

The desire to lead must be greater than the need to stay behind the curtains or behind the book.

  • You have to speak up when necessary.
  • You have to take initiative when an opportunity pops up.
  • When you do socialize, you must show your best.
  • You have to shine at the key social gatherings and push yourself through them.
  • You have to be a good communicator
  • It’s good that you think before you talk and act, but you must act.
There’s nothing wrong with being an introvert. If you are emotionally unstable, being an introvert can become the biggest enemy of your progress in life.
There’s a big difference between being an introvert and being afraid of public speaking, meeting people and speaking up when necessary. Social anxiety is not introversion, it’s a fear you must face and overcome.

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