There is a false understanding that a happy life means you are happy all the time. However, a part of a happy life is learning to embrace painful emotions.

Pursuing happiness

When you put pressure on a system, it grows stronger. For example, our muscular system. When we go to the gym and lift weights, we put pressure on our muscles and it grows stronger.  This is known as antifragility. On a psychological level, it is called post-traumatic growth, or PTG. Where post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is about breaking down, PTG is about growing stronger because of pressure or stress.

Antifragility

We know that happiness is a good thing, but we also know from research that people who pursue happiness directly end up unhappy and are more likely to experience depression. The way to find happiness is to pursue it indirectly.  Using the SPIRE model can trigger the antifragile system. SPIRE stands for:<ul><li>Spiritual wellbeing</li><li>Physical wellbeing</li><li>Intellectual wellbeing</li><li>Relational wellbeing</li><li>Emotional wellbeing.</li></ul>

The science of happiness

<ul><li>Spirituality is about finding a sense of meaning in life. When you wake up with a purpose, you're more likely to overcome difficulties.</li><li>Physical wellbeing. Stress can be seen as a silent killer. However, the real problem is lacking recovery. Almost 50% of employees don't use up their vacation time.</li><li>Intellectual wellbeing. People who are curious and deeply engaged with material live longer. It can be text, a work of art, nature.</li><li>Relational wellbeing has to do with spending quality time with people we care about.</li><li>Emotional wellbeing can be summed up as showing gratitude.</li></ul>

The SPIRE model

Don’t chase happiness. Become antifragile, with Tal Ben-Shahar Subscribe to Big Think on YouTube ►► https://www.youtube.com/c/bigthink Up next ►► The science of happiness, motivation, and meaning | Dan Ariely https://youtu.be/6yQiBT_W2VA Antifragility is the idea of putting pressure on a system, or human, the system or human actually grows bigger and stronger. Antifragile systems are all around us. One example of this is our muscular system. We go to the gym to lift weights. By doing so we are putting pressure on our system to help it grow stronger. The human body is an antifragile system. From a psychological perspective, antifragility comes in the form of PTG, or post-traumatic growth. After we experience a stressful event, we learn and grow to become more resilient. To learn even more from the world's biggest thinkers, get Big Think+ for your business: https://bigthink.com/plus/ Read the video transcript: https://bigthink.com/videos/happiness/ ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------- About Tal Ben-Shahar: Dr. Tal Ben-Shahar is an internationally renowned teacher and author in the fields of happiness and leadership. After graduating from Harvard with a BA in Philosophy and Psychology and a PhD in Organizational Behavior, Tal taught two of the most popular courses in Harvard’s history: Positive Psychology and The Psychology of Leadership. He then taught Happiness Studies at Columbia University. A prolific writer, Tal's books have appeared on best-sellers lists around the world and have been translated into more than 30 languages. Tal Ben-Shahar consults and lectures to executives in multinational corporations, educational institutions, and the general public. Topics include leadership, education, ethics, happiness, self-esteem, resilience, goal setting and mindfulness. Dr. Tal Ben-Shahar is also the co-founder of the Happiness Studies Academy. Learn more here: https://www.happinessstudies.academy/ Tal is an avid sportsman and a certified yoga instructor whose work bridges Eastern and Western traditions, ancient wisdom and modern technology, science and art. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Read more of our stories on happiness: Epicurus and the atheist’s guide to happiness ►►https://bigthink.com/thinking/epicureanism-greek-philosophy-atheists-happiness/ The meaning of happiness, according to a baker in ancient Pompeii ►► https://bigthink.com/the-past/ancient-rome-happiness/ How to avoid “toxic positivity” and take the less direct route to happiness ►► https://bigthink.com/neuropsych/avoid-toxic-positivity/ ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------- About Big Think | Smarter Faster™ ► Big Think The leading source of expert-driven, educational content. With thousands of videos, featuring experts ranging from Bill Clinton to Bill Nye, Big Think helps you get smarter, faster by exploring the big ideas and core skills that define knowledge in the 21st century. ► Big Think+ Make your business smarter, faster: https://bigthink.com/plus/ ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Want more Big Think? ► Daily editorial features: https://bigthink.com/popular/ ► Get the best of Big Think right to your inbox: https://bigthink.com/st/newsletter ► Facebook: https://bigth.ink/facebook ► Instagram: https://bigth.ink/Instagram ► Twitter: https://bigth.ink/twitter

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