In every situation(business or emotional), make yourself useful. Usefulness makes relations strong and mutually satisfactory. Don't make your partner request it from you. When requesting, it feels like borrowing. Borrowing is a burden or weight for people. No one really wants to carry a burden for a long time.

Make Yourself Useful 

Stashed ideas

ibediko on Oct 17

<ul><li>Last time we discussed the basics of Newness and how it's different from Change. </li></ul> <ul><li>We also discussed how it impacts our life . Now we will discover how we can use it to our advantage. </li></ul>(Kindly read part I to better understand the underlying theme .)Let's begin.

NEWNESS Vs CHANGE -PART -II

<ul><li>Keep making small change in your life. </li><li>But keep in mind that it's only for a small time.</li><li> This way not only you are you excited with the feeling of unknown but also are assured that you can always fall back.</li><li>Eg. Start with changing the brand of your coffee. Try the dangerous ones, even if you fail you have nothing to lose except a cup of coffee.</li></ul>(Also , once you are aware that the change is temporary, you will try you best to enjoy every moment of it.)

Newness- A Tool To Keep Life Interesting 

<ul><li>We discussed the link between fidelity and Newness in part-I. </li><li>You can use Newness to spice up your love life too, without breaching your safe relationship space.</li><li>To your brain first love and subsequent loves produce similar chemicals. It can't differentiate between them. But the feelings do dull down with time.</li><li> To keep the mojo going, it's vital to add a little spice in your love life. NO NEED OF GRAND GESTURE, BUT SMALL UNEXPECTED ACTIONS ,can do magic. </li><li>Eg. Let the husband try hand at cooking or you can try role play for a day.</li></ul>

Newness-to Add Spice To The Relationships

<ul><li>If you are suffering from a bad habit or addiction, then Newness can help you.</li><li>Take small steps, with ease of mind that you can always fall back.</li><li> Keep taking these small steps ( for 21 days at least).</li><li>Keep soothing yourself from the fact that you can always fall back.And soon you will realise that you have moved forward. </li><li>Eg. If you are a smoking addict then try with 60 puffs limit for a day.</li><li>Then next day include 60 puff + 1 minute of controlled breathing.</li><li>Day 3 - 59 puffs +1.5 Min controlled breathing +1 Apple</li><li>And so on</li></ul>

Newness- A Way to Counter Addiction.

<ul><li>Newness is an incremental approach to change. </li><li>If you are afraid to move out of your comfort zone, yet crave for something better, then Newness is the way. </li></ul>In next part we will discuss few Practical tips for your daily lives, that can make you accepted change with happiness.

Newness To Change

Wrote

Other Act on Oct 11

We spend a lot of time discussing how to spot a toxic person or relationship, but I believe we also need to recognise what healthy relationships look like, for a variety of reasons.First and first, I believe we must know what we are seeking for in order to recognize it when we find it. Second, we must have a mental vision of what a good relationship looks like in order to know how to strive toward it and develop it with our teammate.So, instead of talking about red flags, how about some green ones?

How to know if you’ve got the one.

Both teammates will recognize that the other has skills that they lack in a productive relationship. In what may be described as a ‘power couple,’ you function like a well-oiled machine in both routine and unusual activities. At parties, your differing levels of organization and inventiveness help keep things in order, and your personalities balance each other out. The game is won by the team.

You value each other’s differences and capitalize on them

No, not on a regular basis. No, not in a harsh way. However, arguing shows that you both have strong beliefs and are willing to adhere to them. This is a positive development. If there are no disagreements at all, it could indicate that someone is concealing something, suppressing their sentiments, or simply not being honest about their true feelings. They may believe they are preserving the peace, but in the long term, none of this is beneficial.

You squabble

No such thing as a part-time relationship exists. Either you’re in or you’re out. Both parties must be entirely dedicated to one other and to the relationship as a whole in the proper relationship. This entails sticking together and dealing with life’s obstacles as a team. See the first point.

You’ve all agreed to participate

Nobody is without flaws. However, if we are constantly attempting to persuade others that we are, we will never be completely at ease with them, and they will never get to know our true selves. We are open about these things with each other in the appropriate relationship, and the wonderful part is that they will still love and accept you for it.

You no longer hide your weaknesses

Communication is essential in developing a happy, healthy relationship, and this applies outside of the bedroom as well. It’s critical for both partners to be open and content in this area if they want to be happy together, and it should be something that two mature adults feel comfortable discussing.

You talk about sex a lot

Have you ever had a friend with whom you could sit in a room and be silent without feeling uncomfortable? Do you like to be alone or appreciate each other’s company? This is also a crucial aspect of a relationship: not always having to talk and sometimes just being together.

You may not communicate at all at times

Consider the first point’s sports analogy. If you attempted to pitch like a pitcher or catch like a catcher all the time, you’d soon forget what position you actually play on the team since you were putting so much effort into looking like everyone else. When you’re in a relationship, it’s critical to keep your individuality and not lose yourself. If this happens, you may find yourself being overly selfless and essentially a doormat, unhappy in your situation but unable to express it since you don’t know what you want anymore.

You keep your identities separate

Yes, you’re a team, and the whole “what’s yours is mine, and what’s mine is yours” thing is good, but you’re still two different people with the right to privacy. This means no checking through their phone or spying around. This is a betrayal of trust that healthy relationships do not engage in unless they have given you a pretty good cause to be suspicious about something.

You are considerate of each other’s privacy

The importance of trust is enormous. Without trust, none of the other positive elements that hold a relationship together can exist. You can’t be comfortable with the person you’re with going out without you, or spending time with friends, or even at work if you don’t trust them. You can’t be, and it’ll eat away at your relationship’s basis like termites until it falls apart.

You have faith in each other

Two people in a secure relationship will have to have difficult conversations about difficult problems at some point. If you avoid discussing the ‘taboo’ themes for fear of offending each other, it may lead to tension and the repression of essential feelings. Of course, the other side of this is that the talk will be held in a calm and courteous manner, keeping the other person’s feelings and opinions in mind.

You have faith in each other(Contd...)

Every one of us has a history. Other significant persons are frequently present in our pasts. When you’re learning about someone or getting to know them, you’ll almost certainly come across significant events in their lives that involve someone other than yourself. You’re cutting out a big part of their lives if you trash their exs or refuse to hear about them. All that matters is the present.

You’ve come to terms with each other’s pasts

Whether or not you share the same interests or goals in life, when you truly care about someone, you want to see them succeed and be happy doing what they love. When they put forth effort toward achieving a goal, this means standing beside them, not in their way.

You encourage and support each other’s interests and endeavors

It is not about giving and taking in great relationships; it is about giving and giving. Each teammate’s contribution to the relationship should be consistent, as well as recognized and appreciated equally by the other. The union is doomed when one or both parties quit trying.

Long after you’ve ‘had’ each other, you both continue to put forward effort

I addressed communication in the bedroom before; it should go without saying (but frequently does not) that communication is essential to the success of your relationship in all areas of life. Open, honest, unfiltered communication with your spouse, who you both feel safe opening up to without being judged, and who you know feels the same way about you.

With each other, you are always open, honest, and straightforward

This is an undeniable sign of a happy relationship. Someone should not try to change your personality or character, but being encouraged to develop yourself (both for yourself and for them) is a good indicator. Avoid people who try to diminish your objectives, as Mark Twain advised. Small people do it all the time, but the truly great make you believe that you, too, can achieve greatness.

You want to be the best version of yourself while remaining true to yourself

We spend a lot of time discussing how to spot a toxic person or relationship, but I believe we also need to recognise what healthy relationships look like, for a variety of reasons. First and first…

Relationship

You’re in the Right Relationship If You See These 14 Signs

"Buliding a fort Activates more cognitive learning domains than doing worksheet At the table."

1. Why the No Child Left Behind program actually held most children back?2. Which professions pay the same as teachers?3. Why teaching young children how to read a calendar is a pointless exercise?

Ageless Questions Answered

Preschool system is designed by adults to serve them the purpose of nurturing children.Everyone sitting in their respective chairs paying attention to the one standing in the room. Does it sound familiar? Does it sound like meetings or classrooms?The modern classrooms are more focused on lecturing them playing. Hence serves our parents more then children.Playing with children involves more f brain activity them lectures. We all are very familiar with flight of brain during lectures. This is hampering opportunities of learning on their own; not recognising their own talents.

Pre-school System Serves Adults More Than Their Students

Kids are remarkably adept at teaching themselves what they like. For instance, babies of just ten months can tell when they’re being spok⁵en to in different languages. By forcing a strict curriculum onto creative children, we actually damage this natural ability. So why do we do it?It all boils down to a poor understanding of children’s cognitive capabilities.Unfortunately, adults have missed this simple fact; preschools, which once prepared children for their education, are becoming more like real schools.

Adults Forget What It Likes To Be A Child

Today we know more about children’s minds than ever before. We also clearly understand the importance of high-quality education. But then why aren’t we allocating resources to make these ideas a reality?The teachers are being paid low wages that is directly proportional to the quality of their work. Furthermore, many teachers end up making compromises on their students’ education simply to meet the rigid targets and standards that their licenses and funding depend on.

Poor Educational Funding

At the core of these much-needed improvements would be removing the parts of curriculum that focus on useless facts and replacing them with skills. This would equip young people with everything they need to succeed throughout school and life. Consider how a child could use problem-solving and communication skills while working on a group project in class and during family time. A kindergartner that learns these same skills will also help them perform better in the later years of school.

Useless facts don’t do as much for children’s success as skills.

To a four-year-old watching bulldozers or chasing butterflies in a field, the world is awash with promise. Children come hardwired to learn in virtually any setting and about anything. Yet in today's preschools and kindergartens, learning has been reduced to scripted lessons and suspect metrics that undervalue children's intelligence while overtaxing their growing brains.

Parenting

The Importance of Being Little

Sometimes you should not do what you want, but what is available to you; because getting somewhere is better than waiting unconditionally.

This applies to career choice and job opportunities. Being active and improving yourself in the marketplace is better than staying home waiting for the only perfect job you want. You can always keep looking while working on your other skills.

Career

This applies to relationships. I am not saying it's better to be with anyone than to be alone. That's for sure a no-no, but if you get your special someone, that's an opportunity that you should not ruin for a want that is not satisfied.

Love Life

You can always start with what's available now, then work it up to your wants later. If it didn't happen, you can say at least you tried.