The desire for more positive experience is itself a negative experience. And, paradoxically, the acceptance of one’s negative experience is itself a positive experience.&nbsp;.

Mark Manson Says :

#1 New York Times Bestseller Over 1 million copies sold In this generation-defining self-help guide, a superstar blogger cuts through the crap to show us how to stop trying to be "positive" all the time so that we can truly become better, happier people. For decades, we’ve been told that positive thinking is the key to a happy, rich life. "F**k positivity," Mark Manson says. "Let’s be honest, shit is f**ked and we have to live with it." In his wildly popular Internet blog, Manson doesn’t sugarcoat or equivocate. He tells it like it is—a dose of raw, refreshing, honest truth that is sorely lacking today. The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k is his antidote to the coddling, let’s-all-feel-good mindset that has infected American society and spoiled a generation, rewarding them with gold medals just for showing up. Manson makes the argument, backed both by academic research and well-timed poop jokes, that improving our lives hinges not on our ability to turn lemons into lemonade, but on learning to stomach lemons better. Human beings are flawed and limited—"not everybody can be extraordinary, there are winners and losers in society, and some of it is not fair or your fault." Manson advises us to get to know our limitations and accept them. Once we embrace our fears, faults, and uncertainties, once we stop running and avoiding and start confronting painful truths, we can begin to find the courage, perseverance, honesty, responsibility, curiosity, and forgiveness we seek. There are only so many things we can give a f**k about so we need to figure out which ones really matter, Manson makes clear. While money is nice, caring about what you do with your life is better, because true wealth is about experience. A much-needed grab-you-by-the-shoulders-and-look-you-in-the-eye moment of real-talk, filled with entertaining stories and profane, ruthless humor, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k is a refreshing slap for a generation to help them lead contented, grounded lives.

Self Improvement

The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck

1. Elementary ReadingThis is the level of reading taught in our elementary schools.2. Inspectional Reading Inspectional reading allows us to look at the author’s blueprint and evaluate the merits of a deeper reading experience.3. Analytical ReadingYou can think of analytical reading as doing that chewing and digesting. This is doing the work.Analytical reading is a thorough reading.4. Syntopical ReadingSyntopical Reading involves reading many books on the same subject and comparing and contrasting ideas, vocabulary, and arguments.

The Four Levels of Reading

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Shame is a universal experience. Shame enforces adherence to beneficial social norms. Shaming is a tool and can be used for good or evil. We should use it when the outcome has a greater benefit for society, and when formal means of punishment have been exhausted. Shaming should ultimately lead to reform and reintegration and act as a deterrent against bad behavior.

Shame

Guilt is a private feeling of regret about something you did, and the discomfort leads to self-regulation regardless of exposure.
Shaming is about the possibility of being exposed to an audience.

Guilt vs shame

Shaming can give the weak greater power. It can be used as a tool to encourage structural changes of institutions, organizations, and powerful individuals by exposing a transgressor to public disapproval.

Effective shaming

The audience responsible for the shaming should be concerned with the transgression. The audience should be the victim. For instance, second-hand smoke impacts the health of non-smokers.

Shaming must be relevant

There should be a big gap between the desired and actual behavior. The smaller the gap, the less effective the shaming will be. The degree of bad relative to the group matters.&nbsp;For instance, the worse the level of pollution for a corporation is, the more people will shame it.

Unfairness should be significant

Shaming is most effective when the only possible avenue for punishment would otherwise go ignored. This triggers our sense of fury at injustice.
If a nation commits major human rights abuses, it is difficult for another nation to use the law to punish them. Exposing and drawing attention to the violations may shame the nation into stopping.

Formal punishment should be missing

The transgressor should be sensitive and sympathetic to the source of shaming.
Shaming an organic grocery store for selling unethically produced meat would be far more effective than shaming a fast-food chain for the same thing.

Subject to the same social norms

The audience should trust the source of the shaming. The shaming should come from a reputable, trustworthy, non-hypocritical source, otherwise, the impact will be minimal.

Trusted sources

Shaming should be directed where possible benefits are greatest. We all have a limited amount of interest in shaming. It should be used only for the most severe transgressions; otherwise, people will become desensitized, and shaming will lose its effectiveness.

Shaming used sparingly

The threat of shaming can be more useful than the act itself to reform behavior. It may be helpful to implement regularly. For instance, an annual report on the companies guilty of the most pollution works better than a once-off.

Shaming with diligence

Recently, shame has gotten a bad rap. It's been branded as toxic and destructive. But shame can be used as a tool to effect positive change. *** A computer science PhD candidate uncovers significant privacy-violating security flaws in large companies, then shares them with the media to attract negative coverage.

The Positive Side of Shame

The inventor of Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction proclaims that mindfulness may "be the only promise the species and the planet have for making it through the next couple of hundred years”.Mindfulness is the practice of paying attention to the present moment without passing judgment. Although it might help people cope by reducing stress and chronic anxiety, it does not offer any solutions to our unjust society.

Mindfulness is not a magic panacea

Although mindfulness originated from Buddhism, it has been stripped from most of its teachings.&nbsp;What remains is nothing more than a self-help tool to help one get used to the very conditions that caused the problems. While is it a noble aim to reduce stress and anxiety, it is more important to acknowledge and address the underlying cause of the suffering.

Mindfulness has been repackaged

The message of the mindfulness movement is that the underlying cause is in our mind - a "thinking disease" or a kind of attention deficit disorder.&nbsp;Rather than discussing how attention is monetized and manipulated by corporations, mindfulness advocates to view the crisis as an internal battle. The result is that we meekly retreat into the private sphere without critically engaging with the causes of suffering in the structures of power and economic systems of capitalist society.

The message of the mindfulness

Kabat-Zim initially adapted the Buddhist teachings and practices to help patients deal with pain and anxiety, but soon saw an opportunity to market mindfulness to the stressed-out masses as secular spirituality.Market forces are already exploiting the momentum of the mindfulness movement, to reorientate its goals to serve the market’s needs.

Mindfulness as a commodity

Proponents of mindfulness believe that the practice is apolitical. The practitioners of mindfulness are taught to become attentive and resilient, to de-stress while improving productivity. They quietly surrender so they may keep functioning within the system that exploits them.The branding of mindfulness reinforces the idea that it is an individual's private concern. In turn, mindfulness becomes easy to co-opt for social, economic and political control.

Auto-exploit

The presentation of mindfulness is packaged in a friendly way that is warmly received in popular culture. It has then also become a useful tool for those who favor neoliberalism.Neoliberal ideology holds that all decisions about how society is run should be left to the workings of the marketplace. When mindfulness is mastered in a neoliberal society, it helps you to survive in capitalism, by keeping your attention focussed on the present without judging it.

Mindfulness is a $4bn industry

The rhetoric of “self-mastery”, “resilience” and “happiness” assumes wellbeing is simply a matter of developing a skill - that we can train our brains to be happy by using mindfulness.Therefore, personal troubles are never attributed to political or socioeconomic conditions, but as phycological. This has become enticing to government policymakers: What better way to reframe societal problems of racism, poverty, addiction and inequality than in terms of individual psychology, where vulnerable subjects can provide therapeutic help to themselves?

Disconnected from external forces

We are repeatedly told that to change the world, we have to work on ourselves - by changing our minds to be more accepting of circumstances. We are told to look inward and to manage ourselves at the expense of critical thinking.Mindfulness promises a good life, enticing us to accept things as they are. We are perhaps sold a cruel optimism.&nbsp;&nbsp;

A neoliberal trance

Mindfulness has gone mainstream, with celebrity endorsement from Oprah Winfrey and Goldie Hawn. Meditation coaches, monks and neuroscientists went to Davos to impart the finer points to CEOs attending the World Economic Forum. The founders of the mindfulness movement have grown evangelical.

The mindfulness conspiracy

... avoid negative language.Using negative words&nbsp;will activate and strengthen your opponent's frames and undermine your own views.&nbsp; Successfully arguing a point requires you to establish your own frames and use language that evokes images and ideas that fit the worldview you want.&nbsp;

When trying to get your point across...

Communication

... are structure that are represented in the brain by neural circuitry. Frames shape the way people see the world, and consequently, the goals they seek and the choices that they make.

Mental frames

They are extremely powerful, because most of our actions are based on the unconscious and metaphorical frames we already have in place. And once a frame is in place,&nbsp;the boundaries of that frame and the associations of that frame are all taken into account in our decision making.

Mental frames and decision making

In 1973, America watched as then President Richard Nixon vehemently declared on national television, "I am not a crook" in regards to the Watergate scandal. Not many people believed him. In fact, as soon as he uttered the word "crook," most people immediately envisioned a crook.

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Mark Manson Says :

The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck

The Four Levels of Reading

Self-Improve