An individual's motivational intensity is how strongly they are compelled in approaching or avoiding certain things.
It is an important variable that affects the scope of attention because an individual can experience "pleasantness" and have low motivational states - they're not really determined to pursue anything; however, those who have "desire" have higher motivational states thus are more focused on completing a specific goal.
This is the degree to which people are open to experiencing the full range and depth of their feelings. It also forecasts creative imagination better than intellectual engagement or IQ.
Situations that increase emotional ambivalence:
A person stuck in an unusual environment can show increased levels of creative thinking, and the fact of the matter is that creativity is the experience of unusual and unexpected events. So if you want to increase creativity, ask yourself if your current environment brings out emotional ambivalence and motivational intensity or not.
Emotional ambivalence is the event where we simultaneously experience positive and negative emotions.
Pure happiness and pure sadness rarely occur to us but we do, however, tend to experience mixed emotions.
Being able to simultaneously experience emotions that are often not experienced together may cause increased sensitivity, which is an important contributor to creativity.
Before you apply for a job, you probably first read a listing that includes vague statements like "We are seeking a self-starter who can work well under pressure in a fast-paced environment."
These common job listing phrases can reveal a lot about the company's priorities, the ideal job candidate, and who will fit in the organization's culture.
This does not mean you have to be genuinely enthusiastic about the industry, but you need to come prepared for an interview to show your expertise in the subject.
These titles can mean there's a certain level of expertise and expectation that you will know what you're doing.
But it can also be an indication that the company does not know what they want.
This can be code for a heavy workload. It means things are always busy, so you need to work quickly because it's time-sensitive.
Your job may be in jeopardy if you can't keep up.
This is a popular listing in startups since leaders are still working on the details. "Self-starter" could mean you'll be given little training and have to come up with your own ideas. It could be a red flag for someone relatively new to the field, but it's ideal for a leader who has similar experience and can execute ideas with little direction.
If a company asks for a self-starter, back up your application by sharing the times you initiated a process or took the lead.
These are subjective requirements, and you may need to ask for clarity. One way is to ask, “How was the person that I’m replacing expected to be flexible?”
An agile candidate means you need to be ready to drop something mid-project and do something else.
The thinking is that you don't need to be micromanaged, so you can decide how much time off you take. But the lack of clear structure means workers inevitably end up taking less time off.
An employee may feel bad about taking a vacation. There could also be a cultural expectation that you don't take long breaks. Ask someone in the know how many days people take off.
This phrase doesn't mean you can't negotiate your pay. If you're considered at the higher range of salary, you should stand firm on your value.
To know what they mean by a competitive salary, ask what the range is during the interview process.
"Wears many hats" means you will likely be asked to do things outside of your job duties. "And other duties as assigned" may appear elsewhere in the posting.
Candidates who appreciate the structure of a predetermined set of responsibilities should consider this a red flag. Ask a clarifying question in the interview process such as "How much time, in terms of percentage, do you envision me doing this part of the work?"
This phrase could mean that you will be put under lots of projects and deadlines that will not be realistic. Most people will leave in one or two years.
To succeed in this environment, you'll need to accept imperfection. You will produce mediocre-level stuff and should be OK with it.
A common interview question is "Tell me about a time you had to pivot your strategy." It can also be any question that asks you to discuss how you troubleshoot.
When you see this request, try to anticipate what problems this role will have and describe how you would handle them.
Sea-level rise and eventual flooding is a growing possibility that has been written in many ancient books and stories.
The Noah’s Ark, the Sumerian flood, or the ancient Hindu story of Manu and Matsya depicted an Apocalyptic water crisis thousands of years ago and had a common theme: The Wrath Of God.
The ancient stories and the many modern thought experiments envision a world drowned in water and the resulting problems that aren’t talked about at all.
The sea-level rising is a global warming threat that seems like ‘climate fiction’ to the people in charge and could be a potential disaster if not taken seriously now.
While eating out, shopping, or during a donation drive, some of us make choices that we wouldn’t normally make.
Studies on consumer behaviour show that while some would mimic or copy the behaviour of the person they observe, some would choose to do the exact opposite.
Our choices become influenced by society, and this creates a vicious circle where what is being done by the other person is seen as appropriate to others.
Extensive studies show people replicate parts of behaviour in a social setting while showing their own preference towards some aspects of the decision. Example: While opting to donate in charitable institutions, people would match the amount but choose a charity of their own preference.
Constructive or healthy perfectionism is a personality trait that is associated with finding enjoyment and fulfilment from doing things well. The focus is process-oriented, where you learn from your mistakes.
A darker side of perfectionism is a self-destructive and addictive belief system where the person thinks a perfect life can prevent or minimize the painful feelings of shame, judgment and blame. This form of perfectionism involves trying to constantly meet perceived expectations of what 'perfect' is.
A possible explanation of why people develop unhealthy perfectionism is that they grow up without a sense of support, safety, and nurturing. Another reason can be a reaction to childhood trauma or extreme cultural expectations, where appearing perfect is a strategy for survival.
The consequence of destructive perfectionism is often deep-seated emotional difficulties and unresolved traumatic experiences that might eventually turn into a potentially severe depression.
If you believe you are an unhealthy perfectionist and that it could be masking your own deep-rooted emotional problems, the following stages can benefit you.
Becoming aware of your perfectionism can be very complicated because you've convinced yourself that your perfectionist traits are normal and not a problem. It is good to understand that not everyone is like this.
An exercise to develop more insight into the role that destructive perfectionism plays is mindfulness. Sit somewhere comfortable and set a timer for five minutes. Breathe deeply and close your eyes. Stay focused on your breath. If your mind wanders, gently let go of those thoughts and refocus on your breath. When the timer goes off, check your emotions, such as irritation, relief, feeling foolish. Simply notice and watch them dissipate.
The first two potential stumbling blocks can be mastered by changing the goal of commitment to that of intention. The third stumbling block can be conquered by reflecting on the instances where it would have been good to ask for help and considering scenarios with what you could've said or done. Journaling is the best way to overcome the fourth stumbling block. The fifth block is a reminder that you might need to put this work of halt for a time while attending to anxiety or another disorder.
Rules and beliefs interact. Your beliefs are something you accept to be true. Your rules govern your behaviour. Your rules can limit or expand your beliefs.
Confronting your personal beliefs is about identifying the rules you live by, then considering if they are still rules you want to follow. If a rule doesn't serve you well, write one out that could replace it.
You might be more aware of your own vulnerability and tendency to withdraw. However, if you don't connect with and process your emotional hurt, anger or sadness, they will govern your life.
In a supportive environment, create a timeline, then write 2, 4, 8, 12, 20, etc., on your timeline. Fill in both the good and hurtful things that occurred to you. The goal is to acknowledge the good and the bad. Connecting with pain teaches that you can tolerate it and that your vulnerabilities don't define you.
Seeing the positive results from the efforts you are making in dealing with destructive perfectionism will give you hope.
Go through the ten traits associated with perfectionism-fuelled depression, and with support from friends or family, think about specific ways you can risk behaviour change. Every small change is a win and worthy of celebration.
Procrastination is one habit that most of us have. We tend to delay finishing a task or a project not because we are lazy but because we have negative emotions surrounding the task - boredom, anxiety, depression, and more.
It is a chronic cycle that rewards our present self with a feeling of momentarily relief which could only lead to us procrastinating more often than needed.
The topic of procrastination is highly debated.
Many arguments revolve around the fact that procrastinating is linked to depression, low-self esteem, or anxiety. This may be true, but the Zeigarnik Effect may prove something entirely different; it argues that an interruption during a task that requires focus can improve a person's ability to remember it afterwards.
Everyone procrastinates when there is resistance. Your job is to remove the resistance so you can get things done and move on.
If you had a gym membership at a gym which was 20 minutes away from your place and you rarely ever visit the area, would you be encouraged to go? No. So, instead, sign up to a gym near your place that is on route to your office or the market.
In a public situation, we present a different version of ourselves than from the one at home. Every profession has unspoken agreements about which manners are acceptable, and which are not.
It is then the purpose of the persona to suppress the impulses and emotions that are not considered socially acceptable. The difficulty is when one becomes so identified with his persona that he loses all sense of self. The result is an inflated persona with excessive concern for what people think and a lack of courage to endure conflict and refuse others' wishes.
The 'shadow self' is everything a person has denied in themselves, such as spontaneity, aggression, cowardice, carelessness, passion, enthusiasm. It embraces all the thoughts and moods for which we feel guilt and shame.
The shadow is emotional, for it must oppose the rigidness of the ego. It is prone to psychological projection, where we attribute to others the inferior qualities we do not want to admit are in ourselves. When we perceive a moral deficiency in others, we can be sure there is similar inferiority within ourselves. If we take note of our resentment towards ourselves and others, we have the opportunity to bring the shadow into consciousness.
In the psychology of Carl Jung, the archetypes represent universal patterns and images that are part of the collective unconscious.
The four main archetypes described by Jung are:
The self is the sum of everything we are now, everything we once were, and everything we could potentially become.
The archetype of the self is the start of our impulse toward self-realization. Carl Jung believed the end purpose of human life is to experience this coming together of the whole.
We all have lots to do, as our work, friends, family, home, and social obligations and endless plans keep us running. Thinking about all of the load at once will make you feel defeated.
Don’t tell yourself there’s this huge amount of things you have to do right now. No, there’s one thing, and then another. Make a list of your high-priority tasks and get the important ones done, feeling a sense of accomplishment. If you don’t finish all the tasks today, that’s absolutely fine.
Worrying about things that might happen, makes us waste our precious energy and time. The limited thought cycles get jammed with ‘pre-worry’.
You have all the time to worry about the problem and handle it when (and if) it happens. Pre-worry isn’t doing you any good.
There are things that we can’t do anything about, and that’s life, a game of luck and skill. The skill( and decision part) you can control, along with how you feel about it.
Things like losing one’s job, or having a family member who is sick, are out of our control, and it is no use draining our energy worrying about it. You need to focus on things you can control, like your attitude towards adversity.
For entrepreneurs, the word ‘Yes’ is an exception, not the rule. The small business landscape, where new startups are coming and going, it is common to hear rejection, with investors not interested in your product/service, or a potential customer shunning your product.
But when our goals and dreams are at stake, hearing the word ‘no’ actually hurts.
Sticking to your commitment and progress even in the face of rejection is a good way to cope up with rejection, even if one has to blame the other party.
Blaming is not a good option, but it serves the purpose if we absorb the lesson and continue trying.
Just remember that failure in one area of life does not reflect your overall self-worth and value.
You have a lot going on. If the other person said ‘no’ to your proposal, or you got rejected in that interview, it is not the end of the world, just an obstacle that is providing you with valuable lessons.
Sometimes we move too quickly from our rejections as if the door is suddenly permanently closed. We need to not take rejection at face value right at the first go and show that we are not made of clay.
Sometimes, there can be a lack of understanding between the recruiter and the candidate, and the problem can be addressed by nudging for a reconsideration.
The best way to face rejection is to succeed! Success provides you with the confidence that you are worthy and can take the occasional ‘no’, like all successful people. Improving yourself by gaining skills increases your confidence. Celebrating your small successes adds weight to it.