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Emma

@emmm19

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Aspiring creative writer. I like spicy food and good people.

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298

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695

Stashing since

Nov 11, 2020

27 Published

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99 Stashed Ideas

Self-Efficacy

This is a person's confidence in their own abilities that they are able to control their own behaviors, motivation, and other social circumstances.

Many people struggle with handling insecurity and even goal strivers are plagued by it. Having a lack of self-efficacy denies us the pleasure of setting goals in the first place.

Emma  (@emmm19) - Profile Photo

@emmm19

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Communication

The words you use matter

Good communication skills are essential for fostering strong relationships with team members and being able to motivate people.

Some of the things we say can improve how we are perceived. For example, saying "sorry" too often and for the wrong reasons might hinder how confident you appear. Instead of saying "sorry for the delay," say "thanks for your patience."

Why we use filler words like "um" and "uh"

A study found that one in every sixty words people speak is either um or uh. That means you are adding two or three of these 'fillers' per minute.

One idea on why we use fillers is that we can't immediately find the right word to say. But we could just as well stay silent. The real reason then is that going silent won't work.

Hand gestures are healthy and normal

Hand gestures while talking are a powerful aspect of communication.

A study analyzing TED Talks found viral speakers used nearly twice as many hand gestures as the least popular speakers. People who "talk" with their hands tend to be seen as warm, agreeable and energetic. The less animated are viewed as logical, cold and analytical.

The impact of the QWERTY keyboard

A keyboard's arrangement could have an impact on how we think about the words we type.

The QWERTY keyboard may attach more positive meanings to words with more letters on the right side of the layout. Letter combinations that fall on the right side of the keyboard are easier to type, lending a positive meaning.

Sales pitches are personal emails without unsubscribe links. But if you don't respond, you can often get more email from them.

Set up text replacements. For example:

noint = Not interested but thanks; please remove.

nove - I'm sorry; I have a bunch of initiatives and don't have time for a call right now. Maybe in a few months.

nocant = I'm sorry; I've already made commitments I'd have to break if I tried to make a call or meeting work right now.

These won't work everywhere but are a good starting point that can be edited.

Paul Graham's disagreement hierarchy
  • DH0. Name-calling: the lowest level of argument.
  • DH1. Ad hominem: attackung the person rather than the point they are making.
  • DH2. Responding to tone: The lowest form of responding to writing is disagreeing with the author’s tone. 
  • DH3. Contradiction: you offer an opposing case but very little evidence.
  • DH4. Counterargument: a contradiction with evidence and reasoning.
  • DH5. Refutation:  quote someone back to themselves and pick a hole in that quote to expose a flaw.
  • DH6. Refuting the central point: The most powerful form of disagreement.
How to Say No to Anyone
  1. Say it fast and do not leave that person hanging.
  2. Explain the reason briefly.
  3. Propose an alternative way on helping that person.
Communicating Mindfully

We all may have committed the mistake of speaking something that we regret, and wish our words were mindful and compassionate.

Mindful speaking is effective as well as the ethical choice, causing less harm to others, both offline and in a digital space.

A Case Of Missing Strangers
  • In a decade-old novel written by neuroscientist David Eagleman, called A Circle Of Friends, a life without any strangers was envisioned, where only the people we know inhabit our world.
  • There is a glaring void felt in life without strangers, the people we don’t know but still outline the periphery of our lives.
  • An absence of strangers makes us understand their significance in our lives, as new research shows that engaging with and trusting people whom we don’t know has a significant effect on our wellbeing.
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