While you may feel uncomfortable interacting with strangers, dealing with toxic people can be actively harmful. Effective handling of toxic people can include actions that range from calm confrontation to removing the offender from your life. Occasionally, getting to know a toxic person can enable you to better understand and learn to diffuse their toxic approach.“Find a different boss or customer or friend. Let’s face it – life is too short for you to spend a large amount of your time with someone who makes you miserable.”

Be proactive in the face of toxic people and work environments

Once you have a goal to work toward, achieve it by breaking it down into smaller, less intimidating steps:<ul><li>Find the smallest, easiest step that moves you in the direction of your goal.</li><li>Make sure your step is fully within your control – such as the number of sales calls you will make, rather than the number of sales you will close.</li><li>Write down your step and when you will do it. This should be a real date and time.</li><li>If at first you don’t succeed, troubleshoot what went wrong, adapt your step then start again.</li><li>Celebrate accomplishing your baby step.</li></ul>

Your goals don’t have to be perfect or permanent, but they must be directionally appropriate

Confidence builds your ability to do the things that are important to you, and also builds others’ confidence in you. To grow your confidence, take small steps out of your comfort zone.Don’t start with your most frightening insecurities; start small and grow your confidence as you increase your successes. Surround yourself with people who also believe in you.

Your mind-set can make or break your success

Mindfulness is another powerful tool to support both your mind and body. 
Mindfulness can be as simple as focusing on your breathing, to calm your mind and settle your body and emotions. Increase mindfulness throughout the day by pausing briefly between tasks instead of going right into the next item on your to-do list. Not only can this increase your mindfulness, it may help you determine if moving on to that next task is the right use of your time.

Mindfulness as a tool

Your brain works best at certain times of day, so learn when these times are for you, then plan your schedule in a way that lets you use your brain at its best.“I like to think of mindfulness as one of those maps in a shopping mall with a big red dot that says, ‘You are here.”

Long-term success depends on how well you manage your most important resource: yourself

Success doesn’t equal happiness, but happiness supports success, so don’t wait for the right conditions before making yourself happy; do it now. Self-care will benefit you, your loved ones and your work. Decide what you want your life to look like, and make sure your choices and boundaries support that vision.

Taking care of yourself is your responsibility

“I don’t mean to suggest you start missing all your deadlines, but I am suggesting that if you limit your working time to a reasonable number of hours, you will find you don’t get any less done.”

Don’t underestimate your power to make changes that improve your work-life balance

“If you follow only one piece of advice in this book, please let it be this. You need community to support you in both your career and your life. That need is literally encoded in your DNA.”

You need a tribe to help you thrive

Keeping a journal can serve as a powerful tool for both thinking through potential changes and advancing your career. The popular Bullet Journal method is a great choice, if pen-and-paper is your preference. Journaling gives you space to: Clear your mind, so you can focus on the task at hand.Explore your most personal thoughts, feelings, wants and needs.Experiment and reflect.Set goals, and track your progress toward them.Record lessons to help you in the future.Record your accomplishments, so you don’t overlook them.

Journal

Say “yes” to new experiences and opportunities. This doesn’t mean agreeing to every request anyone makes of you, but saying yes to things you find valuable, even when they intimidate you.Saying “no” is as important as saying yes. Saying no is the only way to keep enough room in your life for the things that matter most. If you’re not certain whether something is truly your priority, consider saying no. Most importantly, say no when saying yes would take your focus away from something more important to you.

You need to learn when to say both “yes” and “no.”

“None of us is born confident, and we are not meant to find our way through this thicket of life on our own. We may climb mountains and slay dragons, but most of us do it at least partly because we know there’s someone in our life who firmly believes that we can.”

Self-care doesn’t compete with your responsibilities; it supports them

Working within healthy boundaries forces you to prioritize and work more efficiently. Taking time for what you need and enjoy increases your creativity and energy. When you insist on taking care of your own needs, you influence those around you to see you and your time as valuable.

<ul><li class="ql-align-justify">Advance career without sacrificing health, happiness or the good life things.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Don’t underestimate your power to make changes.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">You need a tribe to help you thrive.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Be proactive in the face of toxic people and work environments.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Goals don’t have to be perfect or permanent, but they must be directionally appropriate.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">You need to learn when to say both “yes” and “no.”</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Your mind-set can make or break your success.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Self-care doesn’t compete with your responsibilities; it supports them.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Long-term success depends on how well you manage your resource: yourself.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Taking care of yourself is your responsibility.</li></ul>

Career Self-Care

Toxic people come and go, but toxic elements of work culture are harder to avoid. Sexism, racism, homophobia, ageism and ableism still affect the treatment people receive in the workplace. Such biases aren’t fair, but that doesn’t change the reality that the responsibility for demanding equal treatment rests with you. Speak up when your boss is not treating you equitably, for example, with regard to salary. Don’t support prejudice by convincing yourself it’s not a big deal, that it’s your own fault or that the only way to succeed is to remain silent.

Toxic

Working day and night while neglecting yourself isn’t just bad for you, it makes you less productive and creative. It harms social relationships and strains your work relationships. Providing yourself with the space you need to be healthy, relaxed and well-rested, improves your focus and your capacity as a boss, employee, business owner, partner, parent or friend.“There is no definition of success that makes any sense at all unless it also includes the idea that you are happy, healthy and fulfilled in every possible way.”

You can advance your career without sacrificing your health, happiness or the things that make up a good life

Find Your Happiness, Success, and Fulfillment at Work

MAKE EVERY WORKDAY BETTER Like the best advice from a therapist, career counselor, and savvy best friend, this practical resource details dozens of concrete ways to improve work life in any kind of job or entrepreneurial setting. As Minda Zetlin shows, basic self-care principles are the key, and they apply in both tranquil and turbulent times. Her prescriptions are action-ready and available to all. They include: taking doable steps to get from where you are to where you dream of being cultivating both mentors and sponsors (and understanding the difference) navigating the ongoing issues of gender and race bias at work dealing with toxic coworkers, including bosses supercharging the brain for reaching goals incorporating detoxifying mindfulness practices, such as ultra-brief meditation breaks, simple breathing exercises, and power journaling Not just another list of things to do, this invaluable book is there to help in moments of overwhelm or indecision, at the end of a long day, or any time when you need a reminder of your whole-self aspirations and what you’re capable of.

MAKE EVERY WORKDAY BETTER Like the best advice from a therapist, career counselor, and savvy best friend, this practical resource details dozens of concrete ways to improve work life in any kind of job or entrepreneurial setting. As Minda Zetlin shows, basic self-care principles are the key, and they apply in both tranquil and turbulent times. Her prescriptions are action-ready and available to all. They include: <ul><li>taking doable steps to get from where you are to where you dream of being</li><li>cultivating both mentors and sponsors (and understanding the difference)</li><li>navigating the ongoing issues of gender and race bias at work</li><li>dealing with toxic coworkers, including bosses</li><li>supercharging the brain for reaching goals</li><li>incorporating detoxifying mindfulness practices, such as ultra-brief meditation breaks, simple breathing exercises, and power journaling</li> </ul>Not just another list of things to do, this invaluable book is there to help in moments of overwhelm or indecision, at the end of a long day, or any time when you need a reminder of your whole-self aspirations and what you’re capable of.