Anxious and Avoidants:

• Positive outlook on life and dating.
• Maintain long healthy connections with others.
• Don’t overthink.
• Comfortable with intimacy.
• Know when to reach out for support.
• Trusting of others.
• Can communicate needs maturely.
• Can handle c...

• "I don’t have time for them. They’re too clingy."
• "I wasn’t meant for relationships. Better off on my own."
• "See, this wouldn’t happen if I was with someone else."
• "I liked this person for so long, but now that they’re reciprocating the energy, I am no longer inte...

• Build self-awareness around toxic traits.
• Ask for advice/support.
• Gratitude journal about a partner.
• Open mind/flexibility.
• Communicate.
• Date someone with a secure attachment.

• Inconsistent care and lack of affection as a child turn into a fear of closeness.
• Isolation becomes your safe space.
• Relationships represent danger, chaos, and pain.

• High, rigid, superficial standards.
• Romanticize exes, past situationships, and people you’re not currently with.
• Flirt, lead people on, and breadcrumb for fun.
• Refuse to ask for help.
• Get the ick with a person that treats you right.
• Trust issues....

Low self-esteem and fear of rejection.

• Inconsistent parenting.
• You’re the best one day and the worst another.

• Clingy and codependent.
• Constantly need validation from others.
• Always want to be around others.
• Need a lot of emotional support.
• Fear abandonment.
• Feel unlovable.
• Feel the need to perform for and earn love.
• Think other people's...

• Transition from avoidant and anxious to secure attachment styles.

• Go against limiting beliefs (ask questions).
• Don’t overthink, literally call and ask for reassurance (ask them what they’re thinking).
• Self-validation and confidence building.
• Abundance mindset.
• Addition mindset (what can me and my partner gain from negat...

• What are some limiting beliefs around relationships?
• How can I practice vulnerability without compromising boundaries?
• What are some healthy coping mechanisms I can use when I feel the urge to withdraw?
• What are small steps I can take to start healing?

1. Take an attachment style quiz on Google.
2. Research attachment styles and analyze how they apply to your life.
3. Journal and engage in shadow work.
4. List out all your past relationships and create pros and cons lists (helps identify triggers).
5. Develop self-awa...

• What is the root cause of my anxiety when it comes to intimate connections with others?
• Why do I worry about not being good enough for someone?
• What are my biggest triggers in relationships and their root causes?
• What can my partner do to help me feel more secure?...

• Trouble feeling or showing emotions.
• Feel uncomfortable with too much physical closeness.
• Get the ick when people are being caring to you.
• Stuck in a serial dating or situationship phase because you fear closeness.
• Self-sabotage and choose wrong partners ...

• Why do I need to be surrounded by others to be happy?
• What do I fear about being alone?
• What experiences from my childhood contributed to my attachment style?
• What are some of my toxic things?
• What are some insecurities around abandonment and rejection?

• Symptoms of avoidant and anxious attachment styles mixed together.
• Crave care from others but push them away when they try to give it to you.
• Sensitive to signs of rejection.
• Shy away from physical closeness and emotional connection.
• Trust issues.

• I am worthy of love and affection.
• I am capable of building healthy and fulfilling relationships.
• I trust myself to make healthy choices in my relationships.
• I am deserving of kindness and respect in all of my relationships.
• I am capable of setting and en...

• I am willing to be vulnerable and open in my relationships because I have a safe space with the people in my life.
• I only choose partners who are loving, supportive, and respectful.
• I am so grateful for all of the love and healthy connections in my life.
• I can be ...

Caused by:

• Physical neglect.
• Emotional neglect.
• Lack of empathy and affection from parents (constantly put you down, invalidated you, told you not to cry, said you’re being too sensitive, said it wasn’t okay to express any negative emotions like anger and sadness).