“A final word on self-criticism: Do not beat up on yourself. Even if you think you know your flaws, there is no need to advertise them. Most people won’t have noticed.” – Philip Toshio Sudo

Impetus Cite

<ul><li>The Beatles were rejected by record label after record label. One notable response was “guitar groups are on the way out” and “The Beatles have no future in show business.”</li><li>J. K. Rowling received a letter that claimed, “Children just aren’t interested in witches and wizards anymore.”</li><li>Winston Churchill’s father said that Winston was “unfit for a career in law or politics.”</li><li>A modeling agency told Marilyn Monroe: “You better get secretarial work or get married.”</li></ul>Imagine if these brilliant people actually listened to doubt, how different the world may be!

Hey Karen! Stop being so hard on yourself!  Why self criticism is crummy. 

<ul><li>“I shouldn’t have stayed up so late last night.”</li><li>“I watched too much TV and didn’t study for my exam. I can’t do that anymore.”</li><li>“I scolded my son too harshly. I should remain calm while correcting him in the future.”</li><li>“If I keep speeding, I might hurt someone or get a ticket. I should slow down.”</li></ul>These statements, on the other hand, focus on a particular aspect of behavior that an individual wishes to improve. They are constructive rather than simply negative. This type of criticism is often more likely to lead to improved behavior and modifications of perceived shortcomings.

Why So Positive, Bro?

Authoritarian parenting styles, which may be controlling and marked by rigidity, may have the effect of fostering negative self-perceptions and a low sense of self-worth in children. When children feel rejected by their parents, are not treated with warmth and compassion, or are frequently criticized, they may be more likely to grow up overly critical of both themselves and others.

Helicopter Folks

The Levels of Self-Criticism Scale, (Thompson and Zuroff), measures the two types of self-criticism: comparative and internalized.Comparative self-criticism involves comparing to others & finding one’s self to be lacking. Self-critical people in this way often tend to base their self-esteem on perceptions of the way others feel about them and may view other individuals as superior, critical, and/or hostile.Internalized self-criticism, may involve the feeling one cannot possibly live up to personal ideals or standards or the belief that one is deficient in some way. Even success is failure.

The Two Devils 

Self-criticism is experienced as negative internal thoughts about self; specifically about behaviors or attributes. When self-critical thoughts apply broadly rather than focus on a particular behavior, they may be more likely to impact well-being negatively.<ul><li>"I'm a failure."</li><li>"I can't do anything right."</li><li>"I'm not good enough."</li><li>"I'll never get better."</li></ul>The above statements don't focus on any particular behavior that can be improved upon. They apply negative mindset's on all fronts. They may affect <a href="https://www.goodtherapy.org/blog/psychpedia/confidence">confidence </a>and contribute to the development of both physical and mental health concerns.

Why So Negative, Bro?

Excessively self-critical thoughts often have their roots in negative experiences with caregivers in childhood. Studies on <a href="https://www.goodtherapy.org/learn-about-therapy/issues/relationships">relationships </a>and <a href="https://www.goodtherapy.org/learn-about-therapy/issues/attachment">attachments </a>formed between parents and other primary caregivers show that the earliest bonds in life often have a significant effect on a person's future relationships as well as a person's sense of self.When parents give children autonomy, encourage them to attempt things for themselves, and allow them to make mistakes without censure, children are more likely to develop self-confidence and grow up with a sense of security regarding their own choices.

Kids with Autonomy

The Good: Self-criticism , or the act of pointing out one’s perceived flaws, can be a healthy way to increase self-awareness and achieve personal growth, but it may also prove a barrier to one’s <a href="https://www.goodtherapy.org/learn-about-therapy/issues/self-esteem">self-esteem </a>and peace of mind. It may often help facilitate the process of learning from one’s mistakes and can also be helpful when one attempts to overcome areas of weakness or unwanted habits.The Bad: A high level of self-criticism that prevents individuals from taking risks, asserting opinions, or believing in their own abilities may be unhelpful or detrimental to well-being.

What does it look like?

Therapy can often be helpful for people who are self-critical to an extent that their daily function or <a href="https://www.goodtherapy.org/blog/psychpedia/what-is-quality-of-life">quality of life </a>is impacted. Although there is no one specific type of therapy that is used to address harmful self-criticism, a variety of therapeutic techniques may be beneficial.One effective intervention for self-criticism is <a href="https://www.goodtherapy.org/learn-about-therapy/issues/self-compassion">self-compassion </a>/ practicing <a href="https://www.goodtherapy.org/blog/psychpedia/kindness">kindness </a>and understanding toward one's self. A therapist teaches ways to practice compassion and can help a person seeking treatment explore any potential barriers to self-compassion.Respect yo-self after someone wrecked yo-self!

Overcome!

We are all self perfectionists. Take it easy!

Self-criticism can be a helpful aspect of self-improvement, but those who are highly self-critical may find that self-esteem and peace of mind are affec...

Why So Negative, Bro?

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