Situation: Your child has a tantrum.

What to say using RIE: “I see that you’re really feeling a lot . I’m here for you when you’re ready.”

Some advice that [...] hit home. “[As parents] we want to micromanage, but when we trust that our children are capable, our children feel more confident,” she says. “As parents, you’re the secure base, and this allows your children to be free to explore.” Before RIE, I was the micromanaging, nagging boss who barked orders and yelled when I wasn’t being heard. No wonder my twins weren’t listening to me .