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Schadenfreude and social status
Raising your social status feels good because when we do it, it triggers the pleasure-creating reward pathways in our brain. The inverse is also true; studies have shown that having a very low social status is very stressful, and bad for your wellbeing.
But because it’s all subjective and relative, one way for your social status to improve is for someone else to lower theirs. And so, when we see someone mess up in ways that cause them to lose face, and thus lose social status, we can feel a burst of satisfaction as our own status is raised, at no cost to us.
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The ‘Just World’ bias
Our brains have evolved to assume that the world is a fair place, even if the actual evidence for this doesn’t stack up. Our brains respond to perceived fairness and justice like they do to raised social status: they really like it.
So, when someone we deem to be higher...
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Schadenfreude: enjoying the misfortune of others
Schadenfreude, the experience of pleasure at the misfortune of others, is a very common emotion. It may seem mean-spirited, vindictive even, but if you have ever felt guilt about the satisfaction you experienced when someone else messed up, don’t be too hard on yourself.
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Music and social pleasure
The closest we can come to hold on to pleasure is in music. It is a tension-and-release kind of thing that can keep you going for a long time, waxing and waning, desiring and enjoying.
Music also tends to unite us - dancing with someone is more fun than doing it alone. It's all about other ...
Status is a very old game and a zero-sum game.
We’ve been playing it since monkey tribes. It’s hierarchical. Who’s number one? Who’s number two? Who’s number three? And for number three to move to number two, number two has to move out of that slot. So, status is a zero-sum game.
Politics is an example of a status game.
They play ...
Do a social media detox
Take a break from social media or minimize screen time. It will likely remind you that you are not as busy as you feel you are - your brain is just working overtime when you're mindlessly scrolling.
When we're looking at a beautiful lake, we feel peaceful because there is very low...
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