Dorothy Parker's Quips are Like Candy

Parker’s columns are like candy: read one—even a review of a book you’ve never heard of, it doesn’t matter—and you’ll be compelled to read the next. Unlike candy, however, these are not bad for you. Neither is anything else she wrote. As for her martini-fueled insults, well, the jury’s out. Either way, I am writing to encourage you to memorize some of her excellent quippage to use at your earliest convenience.