CHARLIE

People, all of them, have stories and secrets we’ll never know, so we project our best guess. We fill in the blanks of their lives. We write a quick story and believe it but we don’t give them a chance to read it, critique it, help us see that we create assumptions instead of connection when we c...

Reason: They don't know how big a deal the change actually is. Have you ever started a project so overwhelming that you didn’t even know where to start? This is how change can feel, too.

The Fix: Try using the 4-door approach to give the change some edges.

Most of the time we don’t second guess them, and even if we do, they often end up overwhelming us.

Negative feelings are very powerful and harder to question: we identify with them effortlessly. “I feel it, so it must be true” is often our default setting.