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Postponing Things With Little Value
We often have an urge to do things that have no productive value, but we still do them due to the forces of habit or when we cannot say no to others.An effective way to deal with such tasks is to delay them.
Whether it is snacking, playing a video game, browsing videos, or even smoking, one can delay the desire for doing the activity by keeping oneself intentionally busy.
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While listening to others speak, a million thoughts come to our mind, about how we have handled similar situations, and how many mistakes the other person has made in what is being stated. We normally blurt out at the first chance and criticize the other person, or boast about our superhuman abilities.
A better way is to delay that, keeping quiet and simply listening to the other person, focusing on one's breath if needed.
Do not delay with stuff like appreciating someone, building something great, helping people, supporting someone in need and other positive things that need to be done right now.
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People fail to realise how important developing the habit skill is. They have a specific idea of what their habit will be like, and when it doesn't go according to plan, they feel guilty and think they're a failure.
Overcome this with a flexible mindset. If you forget to do the habit, adjust by coming up with reminders. If you procrastinate on social media block it until 5 p.m.
Whenever an outside force interrupts our progress - we skip gym for a day or two for example - it sends a message to our brains that we aren't good enough and we can't do it and that we should just give up.
Disruption is the biggest obstacle to overcome but we can always change this habit if we look at it with fresh eyes. Instead of seeing it as a negative event, look at is as a fresh start, like it's something we've never seen before. It would help open our minds to the curiosity and possibilities.
- Most people do not like to be in uncertain situations.
- Instead of an uncomfortable conversation, we would like to let the bad situation be as it is.
- Instead of doing something challenging and creative, we would rather be obscure.
- When things overwhelm us, we would like a simple, quiet way to deal with troubling matters.
We need to come towards the edge of uncertainty, the place we don’t like much, but which is full of growth, learning, creating and inventing. It is here when we toil that we find meaning, intimacy, beauty, love and vulnerability.