How To Win An Argument: Heated Debates
Certain topics are bound to start heated debates. It is usually the case with politics and religion.
Empathy and a general politeness even if the other person is saying something absurd and obviously wrong (The Earth is flat and dare you say otherwise) represent the way to go.
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Logic is not the best strategy for winning a debate. Any logic has plenty of counter logic waiting to pounce on it.
A simple NO can wash over:
- Any overwhelming facts and proof explaining why one is right.
- Any valid counterpoints to the other person’s arguments.
We falsely assume that our explanation is bulletproof, and forget that the other person has a choice to not agree with us. We could say the sun exists, and the earth is round, but the other person can simply say ‘No’.
Normally, any debate has the potential to turn into an ugly match, due to the fact that both the sides are trying to win. The problem is that one person will win the debate, and two people are trying for the coveted title of ‘winner’.
The trick is to change the premise that one plays on, forgetting that you have to win, but focussing on a different goal, rather than the sole aim of proving that the other person is wrong and you are right.
Instead of trying to persuade someone that they are wrong, try to create a different premise. You can debate to learn something, or to see the other person’s viewpoint, understanding why they disagree. You can also politely put on the table what you think about the topic, not waiting for them to change their mind.
The fun part is when you are not trying to win an argument, you usually do.
- Agree with them: Find the common point where you can agree with the other person.
- Help them with their argument: They will be surprised if they see you taking their side and proving yourself wrong. This is a disarming tactic that shows you are not dogmatic and are not trying to win at any cost.
- Accept that your point of view isn’t perfect: We all are biased towards our own point of view is the right one and think that we are not biased about it, which by itself is a blindspot.
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Should you try to boost your resume? While the answer appears simple that anyone would like to work on getting credentials and experiences that look good on paper, the larger question includes a bigger set of problems:
Should you do things because they look impressive to other people?
When you have countless open loops in your life, you will never be able to relax.
- Define exactly what you need to do. In blogging, it could be getting a certain traffic volume or sustaining a certain posting rate.
- Define exactly what you will commit to. There will always be more to do. Close the ends by defining the amount you are willing to commit to.
- Define exactly the tasks that need to be done. Make a to-do list for each day and week.
- When you've finished, stop and enjoy your time off.
Language is a literal and linguistic tool that many believe is a fundamental basis of the way we think. Some have hypothesized (like the Sapir-Whorf Hypothesis) that many languages do not have room for certain thought patterns, and are able to alter our thoughts.
The underlying logic is just because there is no word in a certain language to express something, people who speak the language will not be able to think it, and if they learn a different language, new words and phrases are learned, leading to new ways of thinking.