Silent meetings can start with:
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→ People respond instead of think.
When someone shares their first thoughts, we frame what we say next based on a response to that.
→ We run with tangents.
One person’s opinion can easily send us off into a tangent or in a certain direction.
→ Some people don’t speak at all.
Introverts don't speak, and extroverts don’t stop thinking out loud.
→ Our Fast Thoughts Stop Us From Listening.
Our pace of inner speech at 4000 words/minute prevents us from listening, formulating a response first.
Meetings can be completely sidelined in the first 30 seconds.
The deal is this: The first speaker sets the tone for the rest of the conversation, anchoring the entire conversation.
After the first speaker sets the tone, the second speaker builds a thread from that first turn, whether they agree with the first speaker or oppose them. Before you know it, the rest of the conversation is a response to that first comment.
We can call this conversational cascade “first speaker syndrome.”
However, meetings are often frustrating. Most of the time, the same people who do all the talking. They often derail the meeting and make it take longer than planned.
Similarly, it's always the same people who are quiet, and there is a concern that the lack of engagement will affect good team commitments.
1:1 meetings matter. It is important to nurture that essential employee-manager relationship. But it still not easy to get right.
Under pressures, managers are still juggling commitments. Then there's the issue of what to cover, and to avoid a half-hearted performance as a manager.
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