The value of small talk

• Self-expression - the sharing of key aspects of who you are as a person. Most of us are hungry for an opportunity to share what we're thinking and explore things that matter to us. Sharing them with an interested listener who validates those thoughts make us feel understood...

Suppose you know that you're going to meet a particular person or group of people. In that case, the chances are that meaningful conversation will not so much be derived from an exchange of personal information but from having a satisfying conversation about an interesting topic or issue.

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A good conversation is only possible if you are really listening. Stephen Covey writes that most of us don't listen with the intent to understand; we listen to reply.

Part of the pleasure of better-quality conversations comes from being curious. If you struggle listening t...

While small talk doesn't produce intellectual reflection or arouse reflection, the initial conversational exchanges fulfil a social function.

Small talk can be seen as the inactive ingredient in a medicine that holds the pill together. In other words, small talk la...

There is a critical moment of transition in the development of any relationship - it is the moment when you decide to share something more personal about yourself.

Exposing a part of your inner self will encourage your partner to open up too. If it feels daunting, remembe...

A good conversation is more likely to happen if you follow this simple rule: I will give you the space to speak and will listen to what you say. You show interest in the other person, and the person shows interest in what you have to say.

This is not easy and perhaps the r...

To break the ice with a stranger or an acquaintance, comment on your shared situation. For example, commenting on the conference talk you've both just listened to, or the traffic or weather. You can also try giving a compliment, or ask the other person something about themselves....

We like to talk about topics that interest us. But to have better conversations, step out of yourself for a moment and think more about the other person.

Ask open-ended questions, starting with who, what, when, where, why or how. "What was that like?" "How...