Pupils become nerds in primary schools under the pressure form their parents and teachers. As we know in primary school, when children don't know much about the world, they are misinformed and manipulated by their own parents and teachers to proceed and get better marks, telling them that it will help them further in life.This state is maintained till the university.

How it starts?

At one moment the kid will feel like this is normal and will work harder, get better marks in order to receive the compensation for it.At the start they consider it as a good motivation, then as a fundamental thing to work for.But, if they don't receive the compensation, they understand that the work without rewards isn't a work and isn't worth itThen it progresses into perfectionist's syndrome

Evolution of syndrome

This syndrome will destroy human's life.Their point of view resumes to:'every work which isn’t done on a very good level is trash; people who aren’t doing their work on the same level are nothing; the smallest details are the most important'It also correlates to narcissism, which leads to ruined relationships with most people around them.

Perfectionist's syndrome 

The pressure they put to work and achieve bigger and bigger goals breaks both their body and soul.Their body cannot maintain the same output of energy the whole time. Once the limit is reached the body refuses to work.As for the soul - when something goes out of control, starts a long period of depression and apathy.

The pressure on organism

Because of lots of work they do they spend almost all day inside. This leads to defected social skills and deviant behaviour.But they understand that they need the feeling of being accepted by society, and try to fit into it.

Social anxiety

A bit of broscience)It is hard, but there is need of a lot of time spent in nature/outside with friends (maybe partying) to feel how admirable it is to live a full life(being grateful for everything happens to you, paying attention to people around you and little things) than spending all your time on getting useless compensation which obviously sooner or later will let you down.

How to overcome?

While on a lunch with my colleagues, they discussed one's state. I was listening and realised that I was the same in primary school and that I'm grateful for escaping this syndrome.

The Perfectionist's Progression: From Academic Pressure to Social Consequences

Humans are social animals, that's why society was created.Society is a complex, based on relationships between people, and is a result of activities done by them to assure material and spiritual wealth for individual and group living.Nowadays we must respect rules of everyone's nurture and tolerate anyone's whims.If you have different opinions from the mass and you're the one with deviant behaviour.

People can't be alone

As we grow, we become a personality as we show a unicity of principles we either observe and imitate or build them from zero.Of course the education, surroundings, people and relationships differ from person to person. But one thing remains, the intrinsic understanding of what is right and what is wrong, and if this thing is altered our life will be destroyed.Getting diamond-type value principles will help to at least try to attain the life of a high-value person.

Your personal principles

You'll be bullied by the groups you belong to and soon you'll be alone.It is very hard to be alone in first stages of the loneliness: when everyone you know become just your acquaintances, here appears early stages of depression and apathy.As you progress you understand it's quite good to be alone as you can move faster without anyone grabbing and pulling you back.But there's still a need of someone, who can be your mentor or same level as you, to move together and achieve bigger goals.

Stay alone

Usually we belong to groups that aren't high-valuable, and when we start becoming better than those who are around us, they will envy you and passively kick you out.Those who aren't comfortable being alone or facing hard times will let go of their dreams and goals in order to get accepted by group members.The other ones will move alone and become successful materially, spiritually, personally and only then they will observe a phenomenon of high-value people wanting to found a good relationship/partnership

Self-improving

You need people like you, who are eager to develop, level up and move towards their goal.You'll act out of scarcity in finding friends (they usually will not be high-value)But once you get more experience and become more successful in different spheres of your life, you will attract more high-value personalities .

You need people

Do not get under others' rules of life, instead make your ones stronger

When I started my self-improving I usually felt alone and isolated from my friends . Now I feel like getting more mentors and people like me.

personaldevelopment

Personal Development

motivationandinspiration

Motivation & Inspiration

artsandculture

Society, Arts & Culture

Being alone on your self-improvement journey

We spend 3-8 hours on our phones daily(most of this time is wasted purposeless).  Our whole life is contained in a piece of computer with different functions - that's a problem, because we don't quite understand that it destroys our social life and soft skills. We become more addicted to them and exacerbating this venom will take a lot of time and effort.

Rectangle box

Most of us adore parties because it's an opportunity to socialise, make new acquaintances or consolidate any kind of relationships.This is heaven for extroverts and a 'holy crap!!!' situation for introverts)As for me, at one of this parties I got a feeling that this is something like throwing your health, time and money into the trashcan. A mistake that will play a bad joke on you further in life.

Parties

We waste every ounce of our time on social media - giving/receiving likes, sharing posts/images.We don't understand that every time, we enter this SM bubble, unconsciously we destroy our self-esteem and motivation(effectively losing in every important sphere of our life)If we see a beautiful woman/girl:<ul><li class="ql-align-justify">Guys - usually masturbate(we got to admit this)</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Girls - whether support or hate her</li></ul>The same thing goes for seeing more successful men - but just the other way around

Social media

Let's admit that we always know that we have something important to do, but don't want to do it, so we find inessential things to do so we could forget about those important.This means that you're losing from both perspectives:<ol><li class="ql-align-justify">You don't have anything important done - you don't evolve/improve</li><li class="ql-align-justify">You do unimportant things, get nothing but low quality dopamine strike and wasted time</li></ol>That's the reality.

Procrastination

It became clear to me that everything I do isn't important to achieving my goals. So I made a reference for me and other people to keep us accountable of our activities.

productivity

Productivity

Understand yourself and those around you.

psychology

Psychology

The striking art of wasting time

We became slaves of nowadays productivity cult. We continuously work and complete tasks, competing with ourselves and others.

Productivity kills us #1

We all know the statement - compete only with yourself. In this concept we do it the best.If you did better than yesterday - great, you "raised" the level of productivity(nr of things done in an unit of time), now try to keep up with this level for a long time)And if you didn't - you're a piece of crap, and you lose all your motivation to work(

Competing with ourselves

As well we like to be 'stronger, smarter and overall better' than anyone else. That's our competitive nature.Seeing someone more successful than you is a great factor that makes you to leave your comfort zone and start to work. But getting too much much exposed to this factor may leave you too unsatisfied with 'where you are', 'what you can' and 'what you can't'. This will kill your desire to to be the best.

Competing with others

Doing more and more of things isn't good. We can't keep up with the regime/schedule is very hard, and if something goes out of control - you'll feel burnt. You will not feel like working. This is the danger of productivity cult.

Productivity kills us #2

If you already feel burnt - then take a rest, let your organism to recover after a such energy-consuming trial.Filter the tasks you were doing and find 2-3 things you adore or you're good at them.Take your time to determine what skill level you got, and setting goals you want to achieve.Now, start with small steps in achieving those goals, DON'T MAKE SPRINTS - 'cause you will burn(that's not what you want). Work in small blocks of time on all of them, EVERY DAY.Consistency is the key to success.

What to do?

I realised myself trapped in this productivity cult. I got burnt out because of schedules and frames I set to myself. Now I want to start a new program according to the last idea and maintain it as long as I can.

The Perfectionist's Progression: From Academic Pressure to Social Consequences

Being alone on your self-improvement journey

The striking art of wasting time

Productivity doesn't work anymore

Dumitru Lupașcu