In short, knowing what makes you tick and what doesn't can help you <a href="http://lifehacker.com/why-empathy-is-your-most-important-skill-and-how-to-pr-1505011685">empathize with people a little better </a>. When you realize what your partner does and doesn't care about, you can empathize better. <a href="http://lifehacker.com/how-to-turn-an-argument-into-a-productive-discussion-1171337265">Your reasons for fighting </a>make a little more sense. When you understand why you're fighting, you're in a better position to come up with a solution. Beyond fighting less (or at least more productively), the concept of love languages is a great for maintaining the relationship, too. For example, I know both of us feel affection by spending quality time together, so I know it's important to schedule this time to keeping our relationship strong. If we ever had a long distance relationship, we'd probably struggle quite a bit with it, and we'd need to put in more effort than people who don't speak the language of quality time. When you've been in a relationship for a long time, it's easy to get complacent and let things get stale. When you know your partner's love language, it's incredibly easy to recharge. It's like a cheat code for your relationship.

Of course, the concept is also helpful in simply expressing your love in the best possible way. For my fiancé's birthdays, I'd always put a huge amount of thought into his physical gift. Now that I know quality time is more important to him, I cater to that instead. I put more energy into planning birthday trips together rather than whatever physical gift I'm going to buy him.

It took time to realize that his love language is 100 percent words of affirmation and zero percent quality time or acts of service. It seems strange to me, but that's him, and that's how he expresses (or doesn't express) affection. Once I got that, his lack of phone calls stopped hurting my feelings. And it works the other way, too. Recently, he complained that my dad and I always want to talk to him on the phone and he doesn't understand why.

Getting to know a person in a romantic relationship is a gradual process. Over time, you learn more and more about them, including their likes and dislikes, and how they think. Later on in a relationship, maybe you've wished your partner could read your mind and know what sets you off, and what you respond well to.

How 'The Five Love Languages' Can Improve Your Relationships

Johan Lim