Sometimes we feel as if we've done the right thing, but still feel like we've made a big mistake. The song "Rhythm Redux" tells the aftermath of a trying actor choosing to go to his friends wedding over a callback for a big film, but no one really noticed him at the wedding, so he feels like he made the wrong choice. And the rest of the song is a battle between his desires and his morality, fighting between doing what's right and what feels good.

Making Hard Decisions 

"Thomas: I'm saying if I made the right choice Why don't I feel right?Patton (Morality): you may not tonight, but in time you... might?Thomas: I don't know I think this feelings here to stay..."Ahhh, this is a familiar feeling right? I feel like we all have had this at one point or another. Kind of catch-22 situation where there is a big decision to be made, but none of the options seem good. I'll be darned if I do, and darned if I don't.

Doing What's Right Sometimes Feels Wrong

This is shown more in their full episode "Putting Others First - Selfishness vs. Selflessness Redux", (go watch it it's great!) But their main point was that while it's great to put others first, you shouldn't lose yourself in the act, and you can't help others if you're not even taking care of yourself. But it says that the world is a messy place and you can't be a perfect friend no matter how hard you try, and as long as you try to communicate with the involved parties, you can be a bit selfish.

Morals vs. Altruism

Selfishness is not an inherently bad thing, it's just a matter of balance. Obviously too much selfishness is bad, and makes you seem self centered and unsympathetic. But too much selflessness is also bad, making it seem like others control your life, and you're not taking charge. It's your life not anyone else's.

All Things In Moderation, Even Selfishness

Selfishness gets a bad rap, because most people just associate the overabundance of it with the pure concept. It's bad to be a selfish person who always puts their needs above others, but you should put yourself first a considerable amount of the time. it's healthy to give yourself a little treat occasionally, and as long as you aren't brash or haughty about it, it's just a normal part of being human.

Selfishness Or Self Care?

Sanders Sides is a video series created by Thomas Sanders. (Character) Thomas deals with mental health through talking with different sides of personality. There is a lot in these episodes that you can learn about mental health, dealing with conflict, and learning more about yourself everyday.

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Rhythm Redux · Thomas Sanders

Rhythm Redux

℗ Foster Dawg, Inc

Released on: 2020-05-22

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Rhythm Redux

Using Sanders Sides to Understand Morality 

We, as humans, have a lot of expectations, we expect things to work a certain way, to go well, or not, depending on the circumstances. We create this preconceived notion of how things will or should happen. And these expectations seriously taint our perception of performance. If something fails to meet our high standards, it's a failure, even if it really wasn't all that bad. And if something exceeds low expectations, it's a masterpiece, even if it really wasn't that great.

Our Expectations

Often times we expect reality to mesh with our ideas or expectations, and when it doesn't it's a catastrophic event, even if it was pretty predictable had we just let go of those cherished expectations and ideals. We shouldn't let these ideas of what 'should be' cloud our vison of what 'could be'.

Expectations vs. Reality 

From my experience, disconnecting from your expectations and embracing the here and now, can decrease stress and help create a more mindful atmosphere. Whether your circumstances are exactly how how you'd like them or not, take a moment to look at things not through a lense of good and bad, but just as things that have happened. However, you should still keep track of your own personal feelings and opinions, because without them you might slip into a rut of mediocrity.

Disconnecting

It's good to have that fuel, that drive, those motives, that's what keeps you going when times get tough, that's what gets you started. It riles you up and gives you that burning passion to create, but it shouldn't entirely consume you, because then you start to lose sight of the big picture. We become so focused on our own perspective that we forget how it fits in, the uniqueness and perspective it contributes to the whole. And that's when tribe culture starts developing.

Retain Ambition But Keep An Open Mind 

The tribe is a social concept that describes when people with similar thoughts and beliefs band together and turn against people with differing beliefs. It develops when we lose sight of our bigger picture, of our shared humanity that connects us and focuses on our differences, rather than our many similarities. It breeds a culture of conflict and discrimination, judging people based purely off of their differences. Based off stigma, an expectation of a negative trait or behavior, just because of a difference. Just because of our expectations.

The Tribe

Expectations can shape our reality, but we shouldn't let them blind us. They can be resources to use, opinions to share and explore, but we should always keep an open mind

Understand yourself and those around you.

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The Power of Expectations

Emotions are fickle things; they don't follow the world's view of 'logic' or 'reason' but are just as valid as any sort of conclusion. Some people feel things deeper than others, and some people think that they shouldn't interfere with day-to-day life.There are some people who just know what to say, who are masters in comforting and calming the troubled soul, and then there are those who don't quite know what to do, who have a hard time understanding the world of emotional depth.

People Are Unique, So Are Emotions:

When you see a friend in distress or sadness, this is the type of person to approach the situation with a pragmatic view, and try to solve what they think is causing the problem.They may view it as an equation, or an inequality to be balanced, and this can be really valuable in certain cases when such a problem needs a thought through solution. However, they may come off as a bit blunt, and sometimes all a person needs is a hug and a listening ear. While Pragmatists are certainly capable of this kind of support, it doesn't often come naturally to them.

The Pragmatist:

Then are the people who tend to involve more emotional validation. The type of people who just want a hug, and to be told "it's going to be okay".When they encounter someone going through a hard time, they sit them down and hold their hand, and tell them meaningful words of encouragement. Some people may see this as overly sappy or "cheesy", but without it, the world would be a dark place. At their best, an Empath can bring light and hope into a world where optimism is hard to come by.

The Empath:

This leads to a lot of misunderstanding and misinterpretion of the others, and their intents.The Pragmatist might think the others beat around the bush too much, and never get around to the actual problem, while the Empath thinks everyone else is being too harsh or brash in their problem solving, and need to slow down and revel in the depths of human emotions. But really we're all just trying to show our love and care for our loved ones, and we all do that a little bit differently. It would do us all some good to consider the other side and how we can support them, in our own way.

Misunderstanding:

I feel like we all could just slow down and consider the other side of the story once in awhile and take it into consideration, because they're all valid, and important parts of our society.

Using Sanders Sides to Understand Morality

The Power of Expectations

Types of Emotional Needs

Michaela Jacobsen