Hands And Fingers

Hands And Fingers

  • Good speakers use their hands to enthrall an audience; hiding hands is a suspicious activity so don’t do that (withdrawn, sneaky, and deceptive).
  • Decreases in touch signify relationship problems.
  • Don’t finger point, no one likes it, and it distracts attention from your message.
  • Thumbs in pocket with fingers out = unsure of yourself (low status or confidence typically with men).
  • Nail-biting signals nervousness or insecurity.
  • Thumbs up signifies goodneess!

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What Every BODY is Saying

What Every BODY is Saying

by Joe Navarro, Marvin Karlins

MORE IDEAS FROM THE BOOK

peter f. drucker

"The most important thing in communication is hearing what isn't said."

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Know The Body Language Of The Upper Body
  • Leaning away or turning slightly is an unconscious reaction to discomfort.
  • Your central (front side) leans into the thing it likes and away from what it dislikes.
  • Protecting your torso is a signal of discomfort.
  • Digestion is disrupted when you are uncomfortable.
  • Bowing slightly is a sign of humility, often cultural and for the elderly.

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Body Language Of Feet And Legs!
  • We often cross our legs when we’re confident and comfortable with someone or a situation (no real threat around). 
  • We also tilt our legs towards the person we favor in courtship. Also, women dangling shoes with their toes is a sign of comfort, and so are footsies. Limited foot touching is bad.
  • When we don’t want to see or be around someone, we’ll often shift our feet to turn away as a sign of being displeased or wanting to disengage. This behaviour is automatic.
  • A knee clasp and a forward leaning torso indicate that someone is ready to leave a situation.

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Learn What People Say With Their Arms!
  • People restrict arm movements when lying! It’s indicative of self-restraint and caution, not necessarily deception.
  • Behind the back: superiority and don’t come close to me.
  • Arms can be blockers, “keeping someone at arm’s length” has real meaning.
  • Arms can be used to mark territory.
  • Dominant people splay or arms.
  • Hooding: hands interlocked behind head: confident and dominant.
  • Wealth is often shown on arms, or muscles, or tattoos, or smooth vs tanned elbows – observe arms to learn about people.

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Pacifying behaviors: Know someone's state without talking!

If you see someone with a pacifying behavior when you speak about something, just note that the person is in a stressful state and change your approach to being with them.

  • We use pacifying behaviors to calm ourselves. Chewing gum, touching our necks, and touching our beards may help us calm down if we feel uncomfortable.
  • A few behaviors that indicate stress – whistling, talking to ourselves, excessive yawning, leg clenching, sliding your hands down your knee.

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Looking Friendly
  • Smile. It is even more important than you think. It's a great way to create trust. We judge people to be more pleasant when we are smiling.
  • Expand. Body movements that go up and out are very open and comforting. Anything that is compressing, like lip compression, is conveying stress.

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This Is How To Easily Improve Your Body Language: 4 Proven Secrets - Barking Up The Wrong Tree

bakadesuyo.com

  • Ignoring context: Crossed arms don’t mean much if the room is cold or the chair they’re sitting in doesn’t have armrests. 
  • Not looking for clusters: It’s a consistent grouping of actions (sweating, touching the face, and stuttering together) that is really going to tell you something. 
  • Not getting a baseline: If someone is always jumpy, jumpiness doesn’t tell you anything. 
  • Not being conscious of biases: If you already like or dislike the person, it’s going to affect your judgment. 

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How To Read People: 5 Secrets Backed By Research - Barking Up The Wrong Tree

bakadesuyo.com

The Anomaly Of Bad Events
  • Bad news, like a catastrophic event, war, or death, happens quickly and instantly, and spreads like wildfire. A bad event does not take time to manifest, though the foundations have been laid long back, off the radar.
  • Good things take time and happen so slowly that nobody notices that there have been gradual improvements and the problem has now declined or subsided.

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Lots of Overnight Tragedies, No Overnight Miracles

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