Interpersonal Relationships are horizontal, not vertical. The boss, teacher, parents are not above you; you all are in the same plane. The goal of IRs is to get a Community Feeling.
3 stes for getting community feeling:
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Life is meaningless. Period.
You can give meaning to it. A grandpa even after being harmed by terrorists, has confidence in others. You give meaning to life. You can do that by following the north star. What's the north star?
Contribution to others. ...
Happiness is the feeling of contribution. The contribution need not be visible. (You do not need to brag for you have written a famous article, for Achievements.)
worth = how much contribution you did.
It is obvious that you shouldn't rebuke anyone but the same is true for praising. Praising undermines one's ability. Let me explain that. What would a wife say to her kid for helping her clean the dishes? She would say "good job" or "great work". What would she say to her husband...
You may have the desire to be known, to be famous right? Suppose you clean up the road daily, and no one even sees you, no one praises you. What do you do? You stop? So didn't you make your task to rest because of others. That's the problem. If no one stops me, I will do the wrong thing. ...
What is freedom?
Freedom is the courage to be disliked by others.
Oh that person just stared you because you were wearing a weird T-shirt, So what? That person dislikes you because you just did what he doesn't like but you do, so what?
Learn to sperate the tasks.
If you are someone who wants to be praised, means you have DFR. which means you life TOO is run by others.
Do not try be a 'special' being. There are 2 'special' beings- excelling, dumbs. They both are doing what they do becuase they are treated as 'special'. Excelling want praise, dumb wa...
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The goal of interpersonal relationships is a feeling of community. This sense of others as comrades. To get that feeling, you should make the switch from self-interest to concern for others.
You can get a feeling of community by making an active commitment to the community. Take steps forw...
All problems are interpersonal-relationship problems.
So if you don’t have a good relationship with yourself then how you’re going to have a good relationship with others? It all begins with having the right relationship with the most important person, you.
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