To Change Reality, Stop Denying It - Nat Eliason
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Forming opinions before trying to get all of the facts straight leads to bad decisions, poor choices, and further frustration down the line. In many cases, it exacerbates the problem.
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We are all in competition, even if we prefer to discount it. Our achievements are only evident relative to others. You swam further, dance better, or got more Facebook Likes.
We are judged by what we can do for others. For instance, saving children or removing a tumor. Social reward is just a network effect. Reward comes down mostly to the number of people you impact.
However, we judge ourselves differently. We judge ourselves by our thoughts. “I’m a good person”. “I’m better than this.”
We think the judgements of our bosses and parents and politicians are unfair and silly because they don't agree with us. And we believe they should agree with us.
However, most of them are just trying to do their best, under different circumstances to your own.
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If a change is well planned, it can produce positive results. However, without planning, change can be hard to accept and appreciate.
The Kubler-Ross Model is the most reliable tool to un...
The Kubler-Ross Model, also known as the five stages of grief, consists of the various levels of emotions that are experienced when facing trauma. The five stages are denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance.
After the model was widely accepted, it was found to be valid in a majority of cases and situations related to change.
The Kubler-Ross Change Curve is also true when it comes to business, work, or employment.
Change can cause a lot of upheaval to the employees. If there are improvements to be made in systems and policies, the employees can't persist in their old ways. Only when the employees of an organization make personal change, can the company move ahead to reap the benefits.
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When preparing to tell someone what they did wrong, avoid using qualifications like "With all due respect," "No offense," or "Don't take this the wrong way" to soften crit...
... and if you must amplify your message, say where your data came from. Never try to simultaneously be a good cop and a bad cop.
Make it clear that your goal is constructive change.
Be concrete and don't sermonize, even if the person that's receiving your criticism knows she did something wrong.
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