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Positive intention

Behind every behavior is a positive intention – this is one of the basic NLP presuppositions. Motives drive behavior. Our brains do nothing without some (usually unconscious) purpose.

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3. Find a Positive Intention

3. Find a Positive Intention

If a neighbor repeatedly told you what a worthless lazy bum you were for not mowing your lawn more often, would it inspire you to mow? I have no idea why many of us think shaming works to change behavior. It doesn’t work for me.

Assuming that this aspect of s...

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59 reads

4. Ask for Help

4. Ask for Help

Ask for help from their/your creative part to create three alternative ways to get the intended outcome.

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56 reads

NLP REFRAMING

NLP REFRAMING

Bandler and Grinder developed the six step reframe technique from their study of Milton Erickson  (ideomotor signals) and Virginia Satir ‘s work with parts. They included it in their book 

27

680 reads

2. Establish Communication

2. Establish Communication

Establish communication with the part creating the unwanted behavior or response. Ask if it would be willing to communicate consciously. This communication might be a sensation somewhere in their/your body, a picture, voice or sound.When you get a signal, first thank the part for responding. When...

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81 reads

1. Identify the Issue

1. Identify the Issue

The first step is:

Identify a troubling behavior or response, something you would rather not do or feel.

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105 reads

3. Find the Positive Intention

3. Find the Positive Intention

Find the positive intention. Ask the part “What do you want? What positive thing are you trying to do for me? The key here is to recognize the difference between the parts intention and the way it is going about getting it.

Have you ever tried to be helpful and the person...

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56 reads

5. Evaluate

5. Evaluate

Have the part evaluate these new choices.

Are they acceptable?

Will they be as good as or better than the previous behavior?

It needs to be willing to try them out for the next month or longer if appropriate. The key here is negoti...

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36 reads

6. Check for Objections

6. Check for Objections

Check for objections with other parts with an ecology check and future pacing. When we change behaviors, we can affect other people and aspects of ourselves. Even changes we think are fabulous have unintended consequences. We ...

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37 reads

Origin of Our Behaviors

When we are young, we try out different behaviors and some of them work. We keep the ones that work, even when times change and those responses may not be the most useful ones. Throwing a tantrum at 4 might get us what we want, at 44 it probably won’t work so well.

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107 reads

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🎭 Playback theater enthusiast 🧚‍♀️ Marketing magician 🧘 Yoga junkie

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3. Find the Positive Intention

3. Find the Positive Intention

Find the positive intention. Ask the part “What do you want? What positive thing are you trying to do for me? The key here is to recognize the difference between the parts intention and the way it is going about getting it.

Have you ever tried to be helpful and the person...

3. Find a Positive Intention

3. Find a Positive Intention

If a neighbor repeatedly told you what a worthless lazy bum you were for not mowing your lawn more often, would it inspire you to mow? I have no idea why many of us think shaming works to change behavior. It doesn’t work for me.

Assuming that this aspect of s...

Practicing intention

Intention is your inherent ability channel your energy and effort at will. It seems simple enough, but it takes a lot of practice to harness your innate ability to direct your attention at will. It takes practice and is a critical skill for the journey toward realizing your purpo...

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