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Outsmart the pleasure principle

Outsmart the pleasure principle

We sometimes say yes to an opportunity simply because it is in the distant future and filling out our planner makes us feel more productive. Saying yes is also easier than saying no. It takes less time and requires no thoughtful explanation. But, when the event comes, we sometimes start to regret our decision.

Sigmund Freud famously referred to these short-term gains for long-term pains as the pleasure principle, our tendency as humans to seek pleasure and avoid pain. When we immediately say yes, we are met with a positive response from the requester, which makes us feel good. However, the pain shows up later down the line, when we actually have to follow through.

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MORE IDEAS ON THIS

Estimate the time (generously)

The next time you are asked to do something that initially sounds exciting, stop and think about how much less exciting work will be involved if you say yes.

Is the total time commitment something you can fit into your schedule? If it is, you considering saying ye...

112

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Adopt some hard rules

When developing your own rules, consider your strengths and the type of activities that energize you

For example, you may feel highly anxious attending networking events, but still recognize that building networks is important for your career. As such, you might set y...

115

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IDEAS CURATED BY

makidd

I see video and web as a way to reach and inspire people.

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The pleasure principle in thinking

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The most common emotion and the source of all our biases is the desire for pleasure and the avoidance of pain. We imagine we are looking for the truth, or being realistic, when in fact we are holding on to ideas that bring a release from tension and soothe our egos, make us feel superior. ...

The Word "No"

If we always say "yes" to others, we are saying "no" to ourselves. We lose sight of our own priorities and instead live by other people's standards. Saying "no" at first may bring feelings of guilt. But "no" is just a word.

You may find it difficult to say no or may fear to disapp...

The Pain And Pleasure Spectrum

In order to really enjoy the pleasures of life, we need to face the painful parts, too.

Pain and pleasure take turns: constant pleasure is a stimulus that must either lose strength or grow. And this growth will either harden the sense buds with its friction, or turn into pa...

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