Not all emotions are created equal - Deepstash

Not all emotions are created equal

Competent leaders appreciate the importance of emotion regulation and rather than simply get upset or angry with employees they might convey their impatience or frustration. Those are legitimate reactions, but they’re often less effective than disappointment.

The frustrated or impatient leader won’t necessarily cause employees to bolt for the exits, but they’ll find it harder to build the close relationships that help teams weather bad times, and their employees’ loyalty will be contingent on continued success.

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MORE IDEAS FROM This word is especially effective when you need to give critical feedback

Emotions are attention magnets

The key for the unhappy leader is to convey their feelings of discontent in ways that will evoke an emotional reaction in their employees, capturing their attention and heightening “the immediate pressures of reality.” 

But it’s essential to evoke the right response–not just any feelings will do.

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This is where a leader’s ability to say, “I’m disappointed” can be so powerful. 

  • It evokes an emotional response in employees, capturing their attention, and mobilizing them to take action. 
  • But it does not convey anger or generate distress, making it easier for employees to tolerate their emotional arousal and diminishing the risk that they’ll need to distance themselves from the situation. 
  • And it does convey vulnerability, in a regulated and measured form, making it more likely that employees will actually empathize with the leader and be motivated to work with them to resolve the problem without undermining faith in the leader’s capabilities.

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RELATED IDEA

Intellectual bravery for fostering Innovation

Intellectual bravery is a willingness to disagree, dissent, or challenge the status quo in a setting of social risk in which you could be embarrassed, marginalized, or punished in some way.

Encouraging psychological safety isn’t easy; it requires a high level of emotional intelligence and a highly controlled ego. Arguably, a leader’s most important job — perhaps above that of creating a vision and setting strategy — is to nourish a context in which people are given air cover in exchange for candor. That’s how you create a culture of intellectual bravery.

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What are emotions?

An emotion is a complex pyschological state that involves three distinct components: a subjective experience, a physiological response, and a behavioral or expressive response.

In addition to trying to define what emotions are, researchers have also tried to identify and classify the different types of emotions. The descriptions and insights have changed over time

Plutchik proposed eight primary emotional dimensions: happiness vs. sadness, anger vs. fear, trust vs. disgust, and surprise vs. anticipation. These emotions can then be combined to create others (such as happiness + anticipation = excitement).

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Strategic developmental feedback

Strategic developmental feedback requires careful thought and insightful construction, in order to help someone learn and improve. It should be:

  • Big-picture focused
  • Organizationally aligned: it should take into consideration the values of your organization
  • Behavioral and specific (should be clear and based on real accomplishments)
  • Factual, not interpretive
  • Both positive and negative (both positive and negative feedback work and fuel for real change)
  • Focused on patterns, not on specific events
  • Linked to impact.

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