Codependency in relationships means being overly preoccupied with your partner to the point of losing your own sense of who you are and what you need. Partners in an interdependent or secure relationship put the relationship first. Not their partner.

Codependent vs Interdependent

The key to making your relationship more interdependent is to take stock of your life. Find purpose and meaning outside of your relationship. Not only will it make you happier and better as a person, but it may also improve intimacy and passion in your relationship.

Keep Working On Yourself

If your partner is codependent, be patient with them. Interdependence is usually a process of breaking with previous experiences (of being let down) and expectations (of being unfulfilled) in relationships.<div><div></div></div>

A Codependent Partner

Sometimes turning a codependent relationship into a more interdependent one isn't as easy. For some, deeper issues can be the reason behind why they feel like they can't do or be anything without their partner. Therapy can be a helpful tool in working through the origin of codependency issues and addressing issues of attachment.

Get Outside Help

Counting on your partner to be your person for everything can put a ton of pressure on them. It’s healthy to have regular time with your friends without your partner. A little time apart also creates mystique and plays into that tried but true adage that absence makes the heart grow fonder.

Have Regular "Friend Dates"

A weekly check-in of pure honesty (i.e. this is where I am at, this is what I feel, and this is what actually bothers me) is a great way to keep lines of communication open and cultivate an interdependent relationship.

Have Weekly Check-Ins

One way to make your relationship more equal and interdependent is to make sure there is a healthy communication channel between the two of you. Good communication rules to keep in mind include actively listening while the other is speaking, no interrupting, and listening first without making any judgements.

Healthy Communication Rules

You must have a conversation with your partner if both of you are engaging in codependent behaviors. You will need a little self-awareness on your part to realize if it is a lack of trust in your partner, yourself, or a combination of both. Deeper conversations should reassure you or your partner that your relationship is going to be OK.

Be Honest About Your Fears

Being codependent in your relationship is just toxic in nature. According to experts, the best kind of relationship dynamic you can have is interdependence. If you feel like you and your partner rely on each other too heavily, there are ways to...