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How to Be a More Positive Person, According to Experts | Time
Set reminders
Write yourself a message on a sticky note and attach it to your computer screen at work (an inspirational quote, a reminder to smile, etc).
Small reminders like these help keep positivity front and center in your life.
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Key Ideas
First impressions
In less than one-tenth of a second of seeing someone for the first time, our brain processes information about the person’s face—which leads to quick conclusions about a new acquaintance’s quali...
Know your context
It’s important to first consider where you are trying to make a good impression—whether it’s a formal job interview or a dinner date.
Context matters. It gives you cues as to how you should dress, speak, look and behave, in a way that matches the setting you are entering to. That is a key aspects of making a good impression.
Adjust your attitude
Try not to look bored, rude or hostile.
A useful attitude is welcoming, curious and enthusiastic: smile, make eye contact long enough to notice the color of that person’s eyes, sit without crossing your arms or legs. This project a positive, open warm impression.
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Key Ideas
Manipulation
... is an emotionally unhealthy psychological strategy used by people who are incapable of asking for what they want and need in a direct way, to control someone or something t...
Common Types Manipulators
The two most common types of manipulators are bullies and “victims”.
Bullies make you feel fearful and might use aggression, threats and intimidation to control you, while “victims” engenders a feeling of guilt in their target by acting hurt when denied something.
Gaslighting
The term refers to manipulation that gets people to question themselves, their reality, memory or thoughts. Gaslighters twist what you say and make it about them, hijacking the conversation or making you feel like you’ve done something wrong when you haven’t.
Gaslighted people often feel a false sense of guilt or defensiveness, as if they failed completely or did something wrong when they didn’t.
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Key Ideas
Find your WHY
Highly motivated people ask themselves: WHY do I do what I do?
If you know WHY you do what you do, and it matters deeply to you, then you will find your strength in any situation.
Your beliefs about what’s possible
Many people don’t really lack motivation, they lack models of what’s possible - they have limiting beliefs of what’s achievable.
That’s why inspirational stories and role models can be so powerful: they open our eyes to a whole new realm of possibilities.
Change your limiting beliefs
Limiting beliefs show up in our minds in insidious ways.
For example, we might tell ourselves: "That’s not me; I can’t do that; or, I’m not good enough."