Focus on interests, not positions

You decide upon a position, but your interests caused you to decide.

Defining a problem based on your position will mean one party will "lose". But when a problem is defined on the parties underlying interests, it is often possible to find a solution that satisfies both parties.

• Identify both parties' interests regarding the issue. Ask why they hold the position and why they don't hold another position. 
• Then discuss and explain interests clearly while remaining open to other proposals and positions.