For years I was embarrassed that I worked at Walmart. At parties or industry events, I answered the question the same way many of my coworkers did.Them: So where do you work, anyway?Me: Retail.Them: Cool.Eventually, I started to realize that masking is a form of self-judgment. I wasn’t confident about working at Walmart. I was afraid to mention the company because I was afraid of people’s perceptions: Main-Street-obliterating, fair-wage–damaging, soul-destroying behemoth corrupting society.

PHASE 1: HIDING

It went something like this:Them: So where do you work, anyway?Me: (grimacing) Uh . . . Walmart?Them: Oh, uh, okay, haha . . . yeah, I heard of the place! Haha, uh . . .By acting awkwardly, I made things awkward for others. By apologizing for myself, I forced others to apologize, too. Eventually, I realized that apologizing was a form of self-judgment in the way that hiding my job history was.

PHASE 2: APOLOGIZING

Them: So where do you work, anyway?Me: Walmart.Them: Cool.Sounds silly, but it really was that simple. Gone was the tendency to hide the truth from others that reflected my desire to hide it from myself. Gone was the tentativeness and questioning, telling others that I was questioning part of myself–and inviting them to question me, too.

PHASE 3: ACCEPTANCE

Whether you’re on a job interview or wooing clients for your solo business. But to do that well, you first need to come to grips with the parts of your job history that you’re least interested in talking about. And that means working your way through these three phases:HideApologizeAccept

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