What People Want

Used on negotiators who travel long distances: to start meetings while the negotiator's concentration is impeded due to jet lag or fatigue. Jet lag seriously impairs judgement. 

Tip for the negotiator: Travel early and leave time for recuperation before meeting the other party. Where you suspect your hosts like to be hospitable, keep news of your early arrival quiet. 

A dirty trick often used against people visiting other cultures.

The approach of "but we always do it this way over here" can be difficult to counter if you're not prepared for it.

Tip for the negotiator: If you suspect this approach in advance, have with you a local expert who knows the customs. 

Carefully negotiate how you will negotiate in advance. Discussing procedural issues will clear the way for much more focused talks.

Don’t assume you’re all on the same page when it comes to determining when to meet, who should be present, what your agenda will be, and so on. 

You and your counterpart may be more collaborative and likely to reach an agreement if you spend even just a few minutes trying to get to know each other.

 If you’re negotiating over email, even a brief introductory phone call may make a difference. This is one of the most valuable negotiation skills to master.

It means finding the doorway that you want to enter the negotiation through. That could be the doorway of safety and liability or of value, the doorway of competition or of future business.

That signature is the habitual way that you go about a negotiation. Understanding your default signature helps you know what you're working with.

Some people try to go in and beat the other person up on price. Other people are really intimidated, reticent, and afraid to ask for anything. 

They aim to reconcile a counterpart’s problems with the need to maintain the peace for society at large.

Using active-listening techniques, maintaining an open-minded approach, and building rapport to influence one’s counterpart are some of the skills used to resolve conflict and this skills can also be used on other kinds of negotiation.

• Communication: Opening communication avenues to your counterpart signals you are ready to listen and builds rapport between you.
• Patience: Allowing your counterpart to air concerns and not jumping to conclusions or rushing towards a resolution also builds rapport.
• Active Listening: An affective skill that helps to maintain an open dialogue and build trust between counterparts also doubling as information gathering.
• Respect: Makes your counterpart feel understood and that their concerns are being heard and addressed.
• Calm: its display helps the counterpart feel there is an alternative way to taking harsh measures.
• Self-Awareness: It's establishing a relationship with the counterpart while keeping communications strategic and purposeful.
• Adaptability: Is to adapt and respond to changing circumstances in a way that further negotiation goals.

A job negotiation is preferable in person or on the phone, as compared to the impersonal and cold feel of the email.

Talking on the phone provides you with an opportunity to build a connection so that the recruiter understands you and your motivations, while you have a better grip on their motivations.

If the job negotiation is on email only, be direct and honest. Email lets you strategize your words carefully.

Having an alternative, a second job offer with you makes your negotiation game stronger, as the employer knows that you can simply walk away. Having the offer from a prestigious company also strengthens your perceived market value.

Having a BATNA (Best Alternative To a Negotiated Agreement) provides you with confidence, based on how strong the employer perceives it as well as how you perceive it.

• High stakes, including communication towards conflict resolution.
• Unpredictable.
• Heightened negative emotions, often leading to conflict escalation.
• Multiple parties and teams are involved.